I used these tips at a meeting where I was the guest speaker earlier this week. I thought I would also share them here, as many of us will be visiting/spending time with elderly parents or grandparents. The MOST important piece of advice that I can give to you is this; Do not have any expectations beforehand. If you have no expectations , you cannot be disappointed . ( I didnt realize I would be eating those words ,Scott E. Nedberg !! ) If you do not live close to your relatives, it may have been several months, or even a year, since you last spent time with them. Remember this: No matter how old they are, or whatever the condition of their health is, they still have their own routine & schedule. Please respect this; your visit will be much less stressful for all of you. Buy practical gifts for Christmas; 6--12 months ( or however many you can afford) of Meals on Wheels, pre-bake casseroles ahead of time, so that all they need to do is reheat it . Put instructions for reheating in large print on an index card, & tape it to the top of the dish. Or, pay for household help for them a few hours a day, pay their utility bills for a few months, pretty, collectible items are wonderful, but its important to be practical. Look for things such as trash piling up, spoiled food in the refrigerator, or stacks of unpaid bills. Call and chat with their doctor. (make sure youre listed on their medical release forms, or HIPA laws prohibit them giving you any information.). When talking with them, do they often repeat things that they have already told you? How is their hygiene? Personal care is often one of the first things to be neglected, in the early stages of Alzheimers or dementia. Above all else, just enjoy your time together. None of us are promised tomorrow ; if you knew that this was the last chance you had to spend with them, how would you spend it? What would you share with them? What would you like for them to know? If there are open wounds, no matter how old, apologize , say Im sorry, or I forgive you, no matter how difficult it seems. Trust me on this, you will never forget it! Above all, enjoy each other, respect the way they do things ( no matter how crazy it makes you!) and make lots and lots of memories! God Bless you, & I hope you have a wonderful holiday, wherever you are!!
Posted on: Sun, 24 Nov 2013 21:58:49 +0000
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