I used to read something like this and swoon. Id think to myself, Love is perfect. I need this kind of thing. But the older I get and longer I spend time with someone I care immensely about, the more things like this sound totally unrealistic to me. You never get tired of them? Really? You mean to say you get to the point where you live together, spend every moment you arent at work together, in each others space ALL THE TIME, and you never get tired of it? ...sure. That HAS to be realistic. Never mind the annoying habits, the cleaning up after each other, the fact that both of you fart. They are most important above everything? How can you hope to maintain a stable relationship if you arent separate from the other person enough to know who you are and what you want and how it differs from what they want? Variety is the spice of life and how can you possibly help them grow as a person if you never offer any resistance? You werent living before you met them? YES. YOU WERE. They have just added some extra beauty and sparkle to your life. That doesnt mean that you cant make the best of every moment you are given, regardless of whom you share it with (or dont share it with). It isnt fair to you to debase yourself to an existence where you are only happy if you have someone else. It isnt fair to them either to put that kind of pressure on them. Im not trying to say I have the right to define love for everyone else, or that how I feel about it is right. But for me, love is about being what you are, unapologetically, and sharing that with someone else. You get tired of each other. You fight. But you take time outs and at the end of the day you fall asleep together. Its about mutual support and encouraging the other person to be themselves to the fullest, and sharing their happiness in success. You are a support for when times are hard but you encourage them to move on to the best of their ability. Above all you are the best friend they have ever had. You help each other grow to be better people but that is a path of SELF discovery within YOURSELF. What it doesnt mean is that you just lose yourself in someone else and forget how to be your own person. In reality, shit happens. You may or may not stay with that person. But if you have based your existence solely off off their presence in your life, yet things arent working out, what you feel isnt love. Love is recognizing their need to move on and doing so for yourself as well. You dont have to be stuck on someone forever to be truly in love with them. And you dont have to be together forever to have loved each other truly.
Posted on: Tue, 04 Nov 2014 23:09:56 +0000
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