I wanted to tell you something. I thought that to keep from feeling sad I would deny or delete all my memories of small children. But in fact I was also making an effort to delete my own childhood. Now I am free to watch the Disney film Bambi so eagerly. But that wasnt it, someone took my mind and opened it to all the joys of a baby walking for the first time. The most beautiful description ever and it freed me from so much of my darkness. .. It isnt just the light we are looking for, it is the moving the Light around in our darkness and showing our whole life in a new way and beautiful way. I remember Dr. Brooks saying to me look at that little girl, MayLing, and just love her and until now Ive never been able to that. I somehow thought that she and I had to pay for all that was done to us. You know something? I dont have pay for all the evil and sadness of my own life all the time. And I dont have to pay for anything that was done to me either. In fact I dont have to keep paying over and over. Someone else did that two thousand years ago. And I free to enjoy life now for the first time. .. There has been so much fun made of the film Disneys Bambi but to my eternal joy I found that that was not the case yesterday. I cant even begin to say that that meant to me. All of us reach way way back to our childhood when we had a mother we loved and who love us more than anything in the world and a father who we started each day with and thought that the sun rose and set through him alone. The story of Bambi is so beautiful. Then we grew up and got so sophisticated that we thought we were so grand that we much have created ourselves! But in fact they were are first real love of our knowledge. .. Now is the Celebration of the Birth of a Baby and the Light of the world. .. (me and the other is my grandson, Tucker, when he was very little. He is my first grandson and is now almost 13 years old. I was just in Chicago and he would get on my bed and we read. Now I have five grandchildren and even have myself back. So why on earth would I now be happy! It is going to be a fun day! )
Posted on: Thu, 18 Dec 2014 14:17:10 +0000
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