I was going to wait to post this for a more appropriate moment in time. But I decided to do so now. Thus now becomes the appropriate moment in time. Just a few weeks before I went to see Jules two years ago, her sister Evas husband, Alex (I hope that is spelled correctly), was a victim of a homicide. I never met the man. He left behind a wife and three daughters. One of which, Precious, will never know her father. It changed their world forever. In the Philippines, when someone is a victim of a homicide, in order for it to officially be declared so an autopsy must be paid for by the family. Since they are poor, they could not afford to do so, having a funeral to pay for at the time. Thus, it was never investigated, and no one was arrested. It is said that people mourn differently. Which is actually not a truism. Everyone mourns the same (Many Buddhists being an exception), it is how they display the mourning that is different. Everyone asks themselves What will I do?, How will I go on?, How will I take care of the children?... And the reality is only after a great deal of time passes do they actually start to mourn the person lost. Initially the concern is on oneself. It sounds selfish, but the person who survived is the one that is suffering now. Only after they come to terms with this initial suffering can they actually begin the mourning of their lost loved one. So thoughts turn to how much they miss the person, and they begin to feel the void. The absence of their beloved. After a good deal more time, the thoughts turn to the little things. Why you loved that person, how s/he made you smile, teased you, was a good person, a good father/mother to the children... All the small things, and we smile. We still miss them, but we are now able to smile. To think of them for who they truly were. I am very into music. And this song is very special. You can listen to it through all stages of grief; from Tears of Suffering to Tears of Love. And the words go well with either. Once we lose someone, they do indeed become a guest in our life. They reside forever in our heart and mind. They never leave us. So this song is not only for Eva, but for anyone who lost someone they loved. And no matter where anyone is in their grief, I can only help it moves them closer to Tears of Love. I would like to apologize for the timing. But sometimes the present moment is best. Yesterday is gone, and tomorrow... There is only ever now.
Posted on: Fri, 03 Oct 2014 17:30:33 +0000
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