I was minding my own business, when the, little monster walked by. So I kicked him in the shins little Red Headed Brat, walked by, he ignored me so I kicked him in the shins again , he bit me on the leg and walked away. I thought, “It was over”. About five minutes later, he returned in his “Iron Man” suit. As his grandmother was busy in the kitchen, he used his “arm mounted weapon” to assault me. Then he vanished down the hallway. Since we have had this “dance” before, I took alternate action. I immediately donned my “Star Ship Trooper” garb and loaded my Nerf “Assault Hand Cannon”. The hallway, as usual was our “battler ground.” We were just, seven paces apart, when he fired his first shot. He caught me in the mid section, and rammed into me, just after shooting me with his “Spiderman” web gun. I yelled “no fair”. As I went down on the unforgiving tile floor. He placed his mask, just micron from my face as he whispered, “you are mine peasant”. I kicked his stubby legs out from him and placed my Nerf weapon into “auto” and pulled the trigger. Suction cup tipped Nerf projectiles were flying all over the place with the hope of at least one of the hitting my attacker. As the din of battle died down and I regained my composure. I saw an image. It was my wife with a Nerf projectile stuck to the wall, just inches from her head. I thought “oh s---- (you fill in the blanks). That is why I am sitting in the entry hall, on timeout. Tomorrow, I plan to glue his shoelaces together and put rocks in his car seat.
Posted on: Sat, 17 May 2014 01:54:34 +0000
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