I was onced asked whats it like now that your on your own? back then I didnt know how to answer I just shrugged it off and said It feels the same as ever however after some time had passed this is what Ive concluded maybe one day you too might feel the same in your chapters of life...here it goes So whats it like, now that your no longer with such and such after blank amount of years together? whats it like? I suppose...its a lot like being astray dog. You were once a dog that lived indoors with your master You were happy doing all sorts of things going day in to day out with your soul companion just happy with your basic routines not really aware of the outside world...but you didnt need the outside world because you had your special companion, there are rules for you to follow and at first it was hard to learn the rules, what she/he likes you to do, what they expect you to do, and what you shouldnt ever do...I know its a lot for your tail to wag at but gosh darn it you learned those rules and lived in harmony with one another. You did cutesy things together like share food, play together, and even got rubbed in the right spot on occasion but somedays you made your companion mad, maybe you pissed on the carpet, tore up her favorite shirt or chewed up his shoes, thing is you didnt do it just to make your other half upset, you did it because you were thinking about yourself, you only thought about tearing up that shirt because you thought it would be a good ol time doing it...what you didnt realize is your faithful others feelings. So there was a fight and some yelling your not really sure whats going on but your upset now. Eventually some feelings are shared and the storm passes and once again your nuzzling on the bed cuddled up to a good book or movie. You go back to your dog life routine, following the house rules and being a good boy. Only one day you mess up again, you pissed on the important rug even though youve been told time and time again not to....your significant other comes home to find your act of betrayal. they scream and you try and give that puppy dog face but unlucky for you that face stopped working awhile back. Your companion packs a few things and leaves slamming the door...and what does a dog do when its best friend leaves? it waits for them. It will sit there staring at the door waiting for that special someone to come back and walk in to their life. You forget about time, you dont know how long its been since you last saw one another, you havent forgot about the piss on the rug...its yours now of course but it stays there. even if you tried to clean it up the smell will linger onto you forever like a shameful odor. At this point you do one of two things...maybe youll still sit there, waiting...waiting for that person to walk back into your life or maybe wait for someone entirely new to burst through the door. youll be united and go back to your happy go lucky life OR option two...you leave. You got hungry and realized that your once loyal friend isnt coming back to feed you like she/he usually did. You walk through the door and see the outside for the first time in the x amount of years you were with that other person. Everything seems new to you but you knew it all once before. So you wander for something new. Hell maybe your wandering for what makes sense like that routine you had. Point is you dont have that routine again. In bed by 10? tch! youve been staying up til 2 in the morning watching your favorite reruns on tv and you know it. you can travel all you like however, your probably not gonna find that routine you once had. In fact when you interact with other people in the world they look at you kinda of funny. Some of the people they will see you for what you are, a stray. A flea bitten mongrel of a mutt thats filthy...no one likes filthy anythings. you might try to interact with them but they only give you an empty smile and try not to touch you, afraid that they might catch what you got. Like the outcome to your own problems will somehow someway happen to them as well. your pretty much a mess that not a lot of people want to deal with. Other people ...people close to you, friends family. They realize your hungry so they feed you pat you on the head then let you continue on again into the world....one day though...youll find that special someone. Maybe it was your previous special someone. Maybe its somebody new. They look passed your dirty fur, your sharp teeth, and beaten eyes and see the real you underneath all that and then they hold you and tell you that you dont have to be outside anymore Being in love for a very long time with someone can make you like the house trained dog. loyal, friendly, happy...then when you lose that someone you become a stray. you try to do the all the things that once made you happy only to feel sad and alone You have to reinvent yourself all over again because somewhere down the line of being with that other person you left a big part of you with them. Like it or not they own it now, you can ask for it back, usually thats what we do because we are too afraid to face the fear of being alone and because we arent up to the challenge of starting all over and building ourself back up. We are afraid to end up the stray. Its a dog eat dog world out there and if you lack the bravery to be by your lonesome then one day your going to find the leg your chewing on is your own. So when Im asked whats it like? I can simply shrug and say back it feels the same when deep down all I want to say is currently looking for a new home, ask again next week. but that wouldnt make much sense...would it?
Posted on: Mon, 06 Oct 2014 03:32:23 +0000
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