IS IT PERMISSIBLE FOR A MUSLIM WOMAN TO ASK A MUSLIM MAN TO MARRY HER ???! Praise be to Allaah. What regard to the idea of a Muslim woman offering herself in marriage to a righteous man, that does not contradict the idea of modesty, so long as he is trustworthy with regard to his religious commitment and moral attitude. It was narrated that Thaabit al Banaani said: I was with Anas ibn Maalik and a daughter of his was with him. He said: “A woman came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and offered herself in marriage to him. She said: ‘O Messenger of Allaah, do you want to marry me?’” The daughter of Anas said: “How little was her modesty. How shameless, how shameless!” Anas said: “She was better than you; she had a liking for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) so she offered herself in marriage to him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4828. This hadeeth which mention the woman who offered herself in marriage to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) – indicate that it is permissible for a woman to offer herself in marriage to a man, and to let him know that she has a liking for him, and there is nothing wrong with her doing so. And the one to whom a woman offers herself in marriage has the choice of either accepting or refusing, but he does not have to express his refusal outright, rather it is sufficient for him to remain silent. Fath al-Baari, 9/175. Al-‘Ayni said: The words of Anas to his daughter: “She is better than you” indicate that it is permissible for a woman to offer herself in marriage to a righteous man, and to tell him of her liking for him because of his righteousness and virtue, or because of his knowledge and honour, or for some characteristic of religious commitment, and that there is no shame on her if she does that, rather that is a sign of her virtue. As for the woman who offers herself in marriage to a man for some worldly purpose, this is something that is abhorrent in the extreme. But it is better for a woman to inform her wali (guardian) of her desire to marry a righteous man who is trustworthy with regard to his religious commitment and his moral attitude, without telling the man bluntly. This may be understood from what one of the two women did, when she said to her father – concerning Moosa (peace be upon him): “And said one of them (the two women): ‘O my father! Hire him! Verily, the best of men for you to hire is the strong, the trustworthy’” [al-Qasas 28:26. But it should be noted that most of what happens nowadays, when a woman likes a particular man, is the result of haraam causes, such as a careless attitude on her part whereby she talks to him and sits with him. A person who has evil motives may take advantage of such an offer to achieve some of his aims. So we must beware of this and protect our honour from anything that may besmirch it. And Allaah knows best. May Allaah guid & protect our sisters from zina, and give them good husbands....
Posted on: Sat, 20 Sep 2014 13:56:25 +0000
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