If my son and his friends came across this video, my son would probably get into an argument. He at least in my imagination of his father, has been so indoctrinated with the terms math, science and reading by his dad. He would swear this gentleman must of heard his dad say these things lol. I mean this speaks to core issues of our inability to competently, consistently , and competitively engage in the American, now global capitalist economy. Tomorrow is his eighth birthday and with his mother doing the lions share of feeding, cleaning and nurturing him. I have for most of those year only been able to interject, what I hope are potent doses of the message in this video. What is interesting to me in this challenge of inner city fatherhood, is the margin of error and how slim it is, decent fatherhood. Like he and I faced a very difficult situation and in that moment in time. I discerned that fear was stopping him from being completely forthcoming with anyone regards a serious of events. So as a first father, I went into a rant with him about the deepest responsibilities of fatherhood. What I felt as a person was a great fathers sole purpose and thats to protect his offspring. In speaking with my son that day, I went into examples of violence. Things that happen in the world at large such as war and also examples of other forms of deadly violence that may present a more clear and present danger to him and I. In doing this I told him that as a man none of those dangers could make me fearful or afraid. I told him his father is one of the scariest men out here. That if I had to protect him, that none of the things that he was frightened of in his five year old mind. Would be a match for the effort I would exert in trying to defend him. That lead to me repeating to him over the course of say two days that he dont have to be scared of anything or anyone but his father and the concept and title called God. In the short term this conversation and four lashes with a belt to his buttocks worked. After the whooping later that night he opened up we got to truth and moved forward. Fast forward three years he and I have been estranged more then ever. We just now are getting reintroduce to legal fatherhood. He is cutting up in Target not listening in duration , or being attentive to what I expect of him. Fifteen minutes in the store I take my hand and cuff the back of his neck. As I explain to him that since he cant be still or ceased to be so antsy, that like our dog Sheba our his iquana he needed a leash. He tears up a little, I ask him what are recourses as a dad? I had asked nicely five times, sternly six times, pleaded once and now we here. We got we want from Target and we are in the car in the parking lot. I start communicating with him like son I know we been thru a lot lately and just now getting in stride but in so many words dont get beat up. As I am speaking to him he is flinching and jumping over what are natural hand gestures. At that point I have a mental meltdown and I begin to think to myself and supplicate to my ancestors. Like is dude really acting like I am going to bust him in the chops? Why would he think that? And this situation is some absolute bull, screw me , his mom and this dude because I never have or would treat him like that! So I comeback from the meltdown gather my thoughts and continue to communicate with him. I say son it hurts my feelings and I am rather disappointed your acting so scary with your dad. Like I be beating you! He says you do whoop me! I respond in seven years three spankings and after the last we agreed there shall be no more. I aint buying it whats up? He then says all teary eyed but dad you said be scared of you and God! I relax and dont know if I should cry or laugh, so I put the car in drive. Start expounding on what I meant and thought to myself this is my son!
Posted on: Sat, 20 Sep 2014 16:12:34 +0000
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