Im a noob writer but i need your opinions on this introduction of - TopicsExpress



          

Im a noob writer but i need your opinions on this introduction of my Youtubers x Corpse party fanfic ;~; im still working on it tho.. so please tell me what you think, although I already thought of a big plot twist THANK YOU -Pikaichu28 --- Pewdiepie!Pewdiepie!Pewdiepie! The voices of the audience kept getting louder as I stepped on the stage of vidcon for the question and answer, I sat on my chair right next to my beloved girlfriend Marzia along with other famous youtubers. Such as smosh and ken. The crowds went wild when all of us climbed up. After answering some of the questions, I picked a girl whos raising her hand with a smile on her face. I can tell that shes a huge bro with that angelic smile. Hey..u-uhm pewds..!Can I ask the five of you to perform the sachiko ever after for us? she said as she waved a paper doll in front of me. ... wait, what? I laughed and refused to do that, did she even watch my lets play of corpse party?I dont even know if its f*cking true or not!I dont wanna risk my life for that!And thats not even a question! Oh!oh!oh!Ill do it!Wait..what is it anyway? Ian said as he grabbed the paper doll from the girl, you can tell that he doesnt know corpse party at all. Dont!Its actually dangerous you idiot! I laughed and grabbed the paper doll from him just to be safe, Dont tell me you really believe that?Pewds, its just a game. my girlfriend smiled. Yeah!A game cant harm us right?!Just like you said!Ken added. WELL YEAH BUT I STILL KEPT ON DYING! I shouted while the audience laughed. Hes right..its just a game..none of it are real..what am I even thinking? While Im in deep thought I stopped as I heard a deep voice from the audience Ill join! that voice is familiar. Ill join too! another familiar voice said, me too! what the f*ck?another one? Well okay then come on in! Anthony said and made the 3 climb up on the stage. We assembled in place and grabbed the paper doll together, i clenched my fist while shaking in fear, suddenly the man with a deep voice whispered into my ear You dont think Ill let you hog all the fun eh Pewds? that voice!Its..cry? i gasped Dont be scared!Its not true at all..well just do this charm then viola!Were safe. his words calmed me down a little, eventually, we performed the charm. When we ripped the paper doll, i sighed in relief because nothing happened, the audience clapped and cheered for our success on performing it. When I sat on my chair, everything kept shaking. I hold onto Marzia to protect her but the earthquake just cant stop. All 8 of us lost consciousness. But after a while, I woke up and looked around while marzia is still on my arms. Broken floors, blood covered walls and decaying bodies everywhere, then shit I just realized. Were here in heavenly host elementary school.
Posted on: Wed, 16 Jul 2014 14:15:49 +0000

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