Im afraid to follow my instincts This is common. We will get a gut response then back off. This is our fear mechanism in our brain simply trying to protect us from hurt. Here are some of the following hurts humans can experience and yes that is in quotations for a reason and youll see why: REAL hurts: Physical pain like being stabbed, punched, kicked, bones breaking and limbs being pulled apart and amputated (sorry but I need to be blunt for you to get it in a way that impacts you). Perceived hurts; Rejection, being yelled at, being argued with, told your wrong/stupid, being told good-bye We dramatize and exaggerate the true nature of such things with our language by saying: My heart was crushed -OH really?? So whats pumping your blood now then? What happened is you didnt get what you wanted, period. Your heart literally is fine. Youre just sad and probably mad. I was stabbed in the back I think you need to go to the ER if thats true and stop blabbing about it. What really happened is someone said words when you werent around and did stuff they didnt agree to do and said they would not do. Your back is fine and they have the problem, not you. That bit me in the butt Well again, you may wanna have that loped at because sitting may be uncomfortable now. What happened is you tried something and it didnt work. -Welcome to humanity! Your booty is just fine. Ill never be whole again Son youve managed to utter that sentence with half of your body...where? In Tasmania? Thats miraculous!! And also you may wanna pre-pay for funeral costs because you wont live much longer with half your body, sorry. -What happened is you got attached so someone or something and its not in your life anymore. These things happen but I assure you, you still have all of your body parts. Ill never trust again. -Okay so you trust the green light when you go though. You trust youll wake up in the morning still. You trust whats in the refrigerator will still be there tomorrow dont you?? YES. The answer is YES. -What happened was you thought things would turn out one way (because humans like to do that) and they didnt. Perhaps someone didnt follow through but thats just a human not following though.. Which YOU have done TOO! Perhaps something didnt happened as promised. This called LIFE and have zero to do with you. -Take away all the melodramatic language and then the truth shows up. Cool huh? Now your thinking voice is saying, UH hello??? Coach, really theres such thing as emotional pain! What kinda Mindset Expert doesnt know this?? :-) Yes youre right, there IS emotional pain but guess what its 100% dependent upon?? Your interpretation of whats going on and WHY. When we make things about US and take things personally and dramatize as exaggerate reality those are called THOUGHTS. - And guess who produces them all by our little selves? WE do. Womp Womp Waaaaaa!!!!! We are 100% responsible for having and responding to those thoughts. No one else puts them in your head but YOU. Then thoughts produce emotions then you experience hurt. -Its a cascade effect. I assure you I can have someone tell me Im an idiotic moron, ugly, incompetent, stupid, yell at me and say I never wanna see you again and not be incapacitated by it. Will I feel some sadness? Sure! -For a moment or while depending on how important that person or situation is to me. BUT I wont carry it around with me as part of my entire identity though. I certainly wont drag it around like yesterdsys stinky garbage and project that as how it will always be in the future either! Is that easy?? Awww heck NO! What it takes is us being really honest about our thoughts and fears and being rational about them... Then choosing to move forward anyhow trusting we know whats best for ourselves. You do NOT know what the future will be like PERIOD. Unless your gut instinct is telling you to literally play Russian Roulette or do something that causes PHYSICAL injury, youll be okay. Choose interpretations that empower you and remember: Not everything was and is about YOU and you cant predict the future! -Coach Prime
Posted on: Tue, 05 Nov 2013 17:38:51 +0000