Im hiding in my car in case the locals come at me with - TopicsExpress

Im hiding in my car in case the locals come at me with pitchforks.. You see, Im in Inverurie just now and popped into a wee cafe place for a sandwich. I made my order, and the lady at the counter started chatting. Ooh, where are you from then? Youre not from around here! I told her I was originally from Thurso, and had just moved to nearby Oldmeldrum. Ah, so youre a fellow teuchter then! she said, shovelling meat into my already packed sandwich. Aye, as good as! I replied enthusiastically, so does that mean I qualify for a twelve toe discount? She stopped dead and stared at me blankly.. Eh? You know.. Because of the.. Inbreeding and stuff? Small gene pool?. Id clearly thrown a stinker, as her face turned from welcoming to poorly disguised disgust. As I grabbed my sandwich and hurried out the wee shop, I saw her staring at me as she picked up the phone.. So thats why Im hiding. Therell be three or four pick-ups waiting for me at the road out to Oldmeldrum, filled with dungaree wearing yokels ready to drag me back into town and string me up above the J. G. Ross Bakers. If you dont hear from me in an hour, send out a well armed search party.

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