Im in a major spiritual battle right now. I recognize it for what it is. Id started back smoking cigarettes and cursing. I justified it, minimized it, and rationalized it the way I know how. Ive isolated, shut down, and dont wanna talk about it. Narcotics Anonymous would say Im in relapse mode. Christians would say Ive become defiant and rebellious. Both would be accurate. The devil is trying to bring me down. Im calling on God to help me through it. Im struggling. I still dont wanna talk about it but I know the results of where that will lead. Time to get honest. Secrets keep you sick. God is a healer but only if Im willing. Ive talked to Him, cried to Him and screamed to Him. Im not about to get high, so dont worry about that. Im trying to stay focused on the solution rather than the problem. I wont hide whats happening anymore. People cant help if they dont know whats wrong. I still dont want to talk about it with anybody. Except my dad. Not my pastor, just my dad. Dad, I wont let the devil win. I love you.
Posted on: Sat, 15 Nov 2014 16:22:25 +0000
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