Im not as happy as I look. Born in a small Indian reservation where youre either poor or you lost your ways and gave into greed & backstabbing in order to get ahead. My life was set in course the day I was born. My fathers a fishermen & my mothers huge family never really gave me the skills needed in order to succeed. All of my highschool friends were either high or drinking every night, I had a daughter at 16 and dont even get to see her because her mother hates my guts. I owe thousands in student loans because I wanted to be an audio engineer. I live where there is no opportunity, nothing for me. Im not really good at anything either, My ADHD crazy head cant even pay attention to anything unless its about creativity, so other than that & talking Im basically useless. Cant even find a job that will pay enough to get these past debts off my back. And still have no one to rely on emotionally other than myself. Its not like anyone else whos met me had hope for me. What you see from online is the small piece of hope I have left, It took me a lots of tears and even thoughts of suicide to even become just this. When you see me in my suit and you see my smile dont think of my tears. Think of hope.. From one lost Indian to another.. I dont care what the world says, money has never made me happy & it never will. I just want peace with myself. Im going to take a break from this for a few days. Gigiiwaaboomin (Ill see you later).
Posted on: Tue, 23 Dec 2014 21:01:22 +0000
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