Im not going to try to get you to open up your heart to me tonight; instead, Im going to try and give you some tools, that you can work with within your own mind, that may help. Number One: Hearts cant be broken. Only egos can, and a damaged or broken ego will shut the door to your heart faster than you can blink an eye. My ego did it today. It took hours of running through my egos laundry list of complaints, in a constant loop, reminding me of all the ways my egos expectations had not been met. The ego is very concerned with its own pride. Number Two: Egos are like children, no matter how old of a body they inhabit. Theyre always about I & Me, - thats what theyre made of - our ego is literally our awareness of being me, our remembrance of things that make us feel good & of things that make us feel bad, and the keeper of our expectations - the things we expect from others and the things we expect for ourselves. Its purpose is to protect us from the things weve learned may harm us and to position itself into situations where we feel were most likely to receive the things that please us. Egos are very concerned with finding pleasure and with avoiding pain - which is why an ego that has been burned by someone we loved and/or trusted, often causes us to feel conflicted when future opportunities to enter into a similar love/trust relationship present themselves - Here is this thing in front of me, that could really bring me a lot of joy and pleasure and contentment, but in the past, a similar relationship changed in someway, and it caused me pain. The pain we feel is caused by the ego shutting the door to our heart, not the heart shutting itself down. Number Three: Hearts are indestructible, invincible love machines.Theyre made of nothing but love and the only feeling they can provide is love. When the heart is open, our little pool of emotional potential is filled with some amount of love inside of it, depending on how wide the heart door is opened. But, on the other side of our little pool of emotional potential, there is a door to our ego, and the ego is capable of flooding our pool with all kinds of feelings that can really disturb or discolor the clarity and integrity of the pool. Thats why all the worlds religions focus so much on trying to teach us to limit the amount of control we give to our egos. The ego can flood our pool with so many feelings; anger, jealousy, disappointment, fear, etc. In small amounts, those feelings come in, get mixed in with the love that the heart provides, and eventually get dissolved, or overcome by love. Love is a purifier. The problem comes when we allow our ego to flood the pool with too much of that other stuff at once, causing the love to have to work longer and harder to dissolve it. What makes it worse, is if the emotional pool is already working overtime to cleanse itself, and the ego dumps in even more things that need to be removed. As you can start to see from this example, the term toxic relationship starts to make a whole lot more sense. Number Four: A toxic relationship is one in which one or both members of the relationship are regularly triggering the release of these non-love emotions into each others emotional pools. It often reaches the point where one or both members of the relationship have to spend all of their time working to clean an emotional pool that is always being polluted. It becomes a never ending cycle, and eventually, the ego decides to pull the plug; it quits - sometimes on the relationship, sometimes on the heart, and sometimes on both. Go through this cycle enough, and you start to see how a person can so easily become afraid of love/trust relationships. I could say more, but Ill leave it here for now...
Posted on: Sat, 06 Dec 2014 05:04:58 +0000
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