Im okay now. Earlier today I posted some alleged jokes in a thread and received some great compliments about how funny I was. Well, needless to say, the praise went right to my head. Later, I took a shower. Id forgotten that I have a very small bathroom with a small doorway. Silly me --- my gigantic head got stuck in the door! I contacted Emergency Services and my gigantic head actually had to be extracted via some huge mechanical device. I hate to think what replacing that door frame is gonna cost me. But thats another issue. The technician gave me some instructions in order for me to avoid similar emergencies in the future. The prescription he gave me said that if I suspected that my head was getting bigger that it was very important to avoid wearing turtlenecks or any type of clothing that night be difficult to pull over the inflated cranium. Apparently, this sort of apparel can constrict the blood flow. He also suggested [although he refused to put this in writing] that I should have a list of ex-girlfriends set up for emergency speed dial on the telephone. He said that their criticism would be the perfect antidote to the swollen dome. He said that normally just one or two sentences from them would usually do the trick. I asked him why he wouldnt write that down, and he just laughed and muttered something about having been married five times. He explained there were liability issues. I just wanted you to know that Im okay now. Be careful out there.
Posted on: Sat, 09 Aug 2014 04:12:58 +0000
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