Im sorry I havent updated you all lately, but Ive had a lot on my plate lately. The long and short of it is that Barbs oncologist has basically told us that there is nothing more that medical science can do for her. He recommended that Barb enter hospice care. Our girls and I met with the Hospice of the Rapidan and enrolled her on Friday. As you can imagine, this has been a very emotional time for all of us. I appreciate the many offers of help and your continued prayers and I wont hesitate to ask for your help if I think it will in any way improve Barbs situation. Many of you have expressed the desire to visit her. But at this point, I need to limit her interaction with others in order to help her conserve her energy. Its in very short supply as she recuperates from the radiation therapy. This weekend, every one of her brothers and sisters was here for a visit. That was a lot for her. Maybe after she has a scan this week and she has some time to recuperate, well be able to accept a limited number of visitors. So please dont feel slighted if I havent responded to your request for a visit. We are just trying to do what is best for Barb. I signed the documents to enter Barb into the Hospice program with a very heavy heart. And with a great deal of ambivalence. She has fought so long and so hard to accept that this might be the end of our quest. Maybe I have a hard time accepting things as they are. Maybe I dont want to give up. But it isnt about me. We have to accept things as they are, not as we want them to be. I had a chat with Barb this weekend and told her that as long she wanted to keep fighting, wed keep fighting with her. She said she wanted to keep fighting. Hospice assured me I was not signing her death warrant but that they provide a lot of services that we may not be able to get through the normal channels of the medical system. We can opt out at any time if we feel it isnt the best option or in the event of a turnaround in her condition. We can even opt out and then re-enter later. So we decided to give it a try and see if its the best option for Barb right now. Currently, Barb is not in any pain, her appetite is fairly good, she is able to communicate and we are able to manage her care at home. Of course, we are all hoping and praying for her to improve and regain some of the her normal activities. But we felt that hospice could help us prepare for whatever God has in store for Barb. And we have to accept Gods will and the do the best we can for her and each other. This is just another chapter in the story of our Quest. Instead of calling to talk to Barb, (she cant really talk on the phone for more than a few words anyway), Ill read some of your responses here. She really does appreciate your love and support and hopes to some day soon shell be able to show you how much. Thanks again for your continued support and prayers and God Bless you all.
Posted on: Mon, 09 Dec 2013 11:47:21 +0000
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