Im sure many of you think Im a nut or a fanatic because I speak out on things that most people wont talk about. Im more than a bit out there. I speak my mind and I speak impulsively. Im transparent with my emotions at times, although I actually keep most of my feelings to myself. Im sure I embarrass my family and friend with the things I write and post. That gives me pause and pains me. As Ive explained before, I have severely damaged self-esteem. Im not looking for anyones pity and I am not a victim. I am working to overcome a lifetime of negative indoctrination and Im working on it diligently. However, as I get healthier, I find that I need to express myself even more than I did before. Im using art, martial arts, and music, but occasionally I feel the need to write and share with the world. Based on what friends and family tell me, Im much too sensitive and I let things bother me too much. No doubt this is true. But Ive been this way all my life and Ive tried to contain myself all my life. I cant do that anymore. I see what I see and I feel what I feel. I couldnt turn my brain off if I tried (and I do.) I would give anything to go through life letting evil, injustice, and suffering roll off my back. But I cant. I must be who I am even if others dont approve. I cannot be healthy unless I am authentic. So from time to time, I post provocative material and I raise uncomfortable questions. Sometimes, I do this repeatedly. If this annoys you or offends you in any way, I ask that you please just unfriend me. Blessings to you all.
Posted on: Fri, 31 Oct 2014 23:16:40 +0000
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