In Januarie hoor ek dat 2014 vir my n year of trust gaan wees. Fantasties, het ek gedink. Dis dalk die onderwerp waaruit al my control issues spruit. Sê nog so ewe selfvoldaan, Jesus take the wheel. And oh, how He has. In elke curveball, val, tydelike tantrum, teleurstelling, en twyfel kon ek deurgaans Sy sagmoedige stem hoor, like echoes from the throneroom: year of trust. En op elke dag regdeur die jaar wanneer ek in hierdie metaforiese glasdeure vasgehardloop het, het dit ook gereën. Toe gee n vriendin gister vir my n boek deur Ann Voskamp en ek lees vanoggend: “Humbly let go. Let go of trying to do, let go of trying to control, let go of my own way, let go of my own fears. Let God blow His wind, His trials, oxygen for joys fire. Leave the hand open and be. Be at peace. Bend your knee and be small and let God give what God chooses to give because He only gives love, and then whisper a surprised thanks. This is the fuel for joys flame. Fullness of joy is discovered only in the emptying of will. And I can empty. I can empty because counting His graces has awakened me to how He cherishes me, holds me, passionately values me. I can empty because I am full of His love. I can trust.” Vandag reën dit weer in Johannesburg. Weerbarstige druppels van genade. En gevolglik ook oor my wang, druppels van dankbaarheid.
Posted on: Tue, 04 Nov 2014 09:08:18 +0000
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