In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods that can be found today being sold in stores nationwide: 1. On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But..., thats the only time I have to work on my hair) 2. On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (And that would be how. . . ?) 3. On some Swanson frozen dinners: Serving suggestions: Defrost. (But its just a suggestion) 4. On Tescos Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box): Do not turn upside down. (Oops, too late!) 5. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Hmm . . . .) 6. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldnt this save even more time?) 7. On Boots Childrens Cough Medicine: Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication. (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those forklifts.) 8. On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. (One would hope) 9. On most brands of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to underwater?) 10. On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (I gotta admit, Im curious.) 11. On Sainsburys peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts. (NEWS FLASH) 12. On a childs Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (I dont blame the company, I blame parents for this one.) 13. On a Swedish chain saw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Was there a chance of this happening somewhere? . . . Good grief!) 14. On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid: Do not use on food. (Hey, Mom, were out of syrup! Its OK, honey, just grab the Palmolive!
Posted on: Tue, 18 Nov 2014 02:13:27 +0000
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