It certainly appears to be an unstoppable trend – marriage numbers dipping even as annulment rates rise. Arguably a symptom of the developed world, it happens to major Chinese cities as it does to Denmark, touted as one of the happiest countries in the world, with nearly half its marriages failing. And for all our world-renowned competencies - our ability to nip problems in the bud - it seems Singapore is not immune to this malaise of modern society. The Statistics on Marriages and Divorces 2013 report, compiled by the Singapore Department of Statistics, showed that marriage registrations fell six percent while marital dissolutions rose four percent. Of course, it’s by no means a simple issue to resolve. Some have even argued that this phenomenon is an unavoidable side-effect of economic and social development. Experts have proposed other reasons including the erosion of traditional values, work stress, the growing independence of women, and their partners’ inability to accept this. There’s a greater social acceptance of divorce as well. Once widely considered taboo, divorce is becoming a more tenable option, with sensational separations of celebrity couples giving divorce an unintended legitimacy. Pressures of the media spotlight aside though, have we in general become more intolerant in our relationships? Is the disposable mentality of our age creeping into our marriages? Are more choices making us less willing to work on and appreciate our current state? Is the wider availability of the “world”, often at a touch or click these days, tempting us to look outside to soothe our spousal hiccups? Not that modern couples necessarily have it tougher. Every marriage has always had its fair share of problems. No human is perfect, and naturally, neither are our relationships. We all need to be willing to identify the hairline fissures in our marriage and mend them before they destabilise the structure. A large part of this involves honestly examining and tweaking our role in the marriage, focusing on the greater good rather than the minor irritations, and being able to talk candidly and non-judgingly with our partner without letting our emotions take over.
Posted on: Mon, 29 Sep 2014 01:12:46 +0000
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