It has been a year packed with tension, drama and no shortage of controversy - Goal looks back at the words of wisdom that made headlines across the football world BET=STO£38DRAW£33MNU£19.1By Mark Doyle The turn of the year is always an ideal time to reflect on whats gone before, so Goal has decided to take advantage of this most opportune occasion by trawling through the most memorable quotes of 2014. Some are amusing, some are touching, some are controversial, while some are downright bizarre. All of them, though, made headlines around the footballing world. So, sit back and enjoy, and be sure to let us know if weve missed any crackers in the space provided at the foot of the page ... WEIRD & WONDERFUL Maybe Louis does have a golden willy.” - Arjen Robben comments on the bizarre rumours regarding the key to Louis van Gaals success as Netherlands coach. It’s nothing but masturbation for conditioning coaches. - Andrea Pirlo dismisses the importance of pre-match warm-ups with typical creativity. One day we wont have the World Cup, we will have inter-planetary contests. - Say what you will about Fifa president Sepp Blatter but he is nothing if not an ideas man. Action replays in a match situation isn’t real football. We all dream of seeing Monica Bellucci naked, but don’t want to see her x-rays. - Italian Referees’ Association (AIA) president Marcello Nicchi argues that it is possible to get too close to the action. Or that some things are better left to the imagination. Were not quite sure. A stadium without fans in the curva is like a woman without breasts. - Sampdoria boss Sinisa Mihajlovic argues against closing stands as a punishment for crowd trouble, in his own inimitable fashion. If we beat Costa Rica I want a kiss - obviously on the cheek - from the UK Queen. - Unfortunately, Mario Balotelli was unable to inspire Italy to a World Cup win over Los Ticos. As amazing as it sounds, the ball hit my moustache. It was a moustache goal. - Brazil striker Fred reminds everyone of the old adage that they all count after ending his World Cup goal drought with an unorthodox finish against Cameroon. I was with the national team at the time. I called Andrea Pirlo over and said: F**k, look who we’ve hired! But now I thank God every day that we hired Porompopero! - Daniele De Rossi admits that he was less than impressed when he googled Rudi Garcia after the Frenchmans appointment as Roma coach and found a Youtube clip of his new boss playing guitar and singing Porompoper. I got Robbie’s mobile number and rang him. It went to his voicemail: Hi, it’s Robbie - whazzup! Like the Budweiser ad. I never called him back. I thought: I can’t be f****** signing that. - Former Sunderland boss Roy Keane reveals why he decided against making a bid for Robbie Savage. Take someone like (Parma striker) Antonio Cassano. He says hes slept with 700 women but he doesnt get picked for Italy any more. Can he really be happy? I wouldnt be. - Pirlo reveals that he has always preferred scoring on the field to off it. It was like being in a barbecue. In these moments you realise what a fascinating thing a cactus is for not withering away. - Thomas Muller marvels at the resilience of nature after Germanys win over France in the searing heat of Rio de Janeiro. DOWN IN THE DUMPS This is the worst day of my life. - Luis Felipe Scolari. July 8, 2014. At no stage has it looked like we won’t go through. I knew we would score, but the impressive thing has been not conceding and it has never looked likely to happen. I don’t want to jinx it, but … Oh, you’re f***ing joking! F***! Don’t f***ing do this! How unfair, man! Mother of God! - Former Valencia ace David Albelda is left in a state of shock after Los Che are denied a place in the Europa League final by a last-minute strike from Sevilla. Everything is s*** because we lost. - Ronaldo Koeman offers a wonderfully blunt appraisal of South
Posted on: Wed, 31 Dec 2014 10:49:27 +0000
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