It may be the combination of recent events coupled with the new moon; when I woke up this morning I was inspired to write this mini-manifesto. Maybe no one will read it, but the present universal aspects and new moon ask that you put your thoughts, wishes, and goals out there so here I go. Bear with me, Im not used to this, as Ive always been an extremely private person. I read a quote this morning that said life is about growth, and I believe that to a high degree. I started out in fashion, going to the Academy of Art (when it was a real art school) and then to The Fashion Institute of Technology in New York. I was drawn to beautiful things, clothes, furniture, people. The first sense of sight. I outgrew that and moved on. I then worked in the rap industry. I hung out with Digital Underground, would visit and party at Tupacs house almost every day. I then moved back to New York, so inspired and moved by the Native Tongue music that I couldnt even sleep at night. I ended up working for the greats Lyor Cohen and Chris Lighty, being a management rep at Russell Simmons RUSH for the very people I was so moved by; Tribe Called Quest, Busta Rhymes, De La Soul, and Brand Nubian. men that were making change. I hung out with Brand Nubian almost every day, as well as the others almost every night. For me it was all about the music, but as I get older, and also from the recent passing of The Poor Righteous Teachers D.J. Father Shaheed, I realize their stories and knowledge were planting some deep rooted seeds in me. The second sense of sound. Eventually I outgrew that world and moved on. I then became an assistant for Matty Rich and his Blacks N Progress production company, and then a Creative Developer for Sony Pictures. Sidney Poitier and the Hudlin Brothers were down the hall. Denzel Washington downstairs. I was in the company of geniuses, again amongst men that were making change. The senses of sound and sight. Eventually I outgrew that and moved on. I had a very popular Black Film blog that I wrote for years, Black Cinema At Large, as there was a dearth of us representing our own images. That evolved in me conceiving and founding Shadow and Act, which is now the biggest Black Film blog in the world. And no matter what that present editor has to say, he would not have his place in the world without me and my ideas, make no mistake. The senses of sight, sound, and thought. Outgrown. I moved back to Oakland, where I grew up, the cradle of many revolutions, to set up my screening entity Black Cinema At Large. It had become deeply personal, through all of my past experiences, to put out as much awareness as I could about social issues and our positive images in the media. My efforts have made a mild impact, and I met some amazing people working toward the same goals through AFFRM and Oju Image Collective, that sowed new seeds into me. But what was the purpose of it? None of it ever made me particularly happy, or rich, or content. I have struggled with deep social anxiety, multiple addictions, at times depression, and sometimes not having a proper home. I was in a constant state of anger and rage about my communitys condition. I had a brief respite by studying Queen Afua, until I wandered into another toxic relationship that broke down and wiped out all of my good works. I have always been a deeply spiritual person, and it was revealed to me early on that I had a mission in life, I just never really knew what it was. and that was very hard. Throughout it all my beacons of light have shown themselves to me. My life has been changed at so many points through the vibration of sight and sound not only by my previous work and associations, but by people that I have been blessed to meet and/or listen to their words in person; Amiri Baraka, Angela Davis, Harry Belafonte, Louis Farrakhan, Sonia Sanchez, Sidney Poitier, Chuck D, Nelson Mandela, Khalid Abdul Muhammad, Spike Lee, The Last Poets. Its never been my goal to be as famous as them, or to be famous period. I have admired and respected them so much for being so strong in their mission, and so clear about making an impact in the Black community. That goes for political activists, rappers, writers, and actors. What could I ever do in this world to even make a dent? It has been an extremely frustrating quest for me, and probably the main reason Ive outgrown so many things, cause it didnt feel right, it didnt fit--it didnt feel like my mission. Yes, one purpose in life is growth, but I also believe the other is to help others. My people are at war; in deep pain. Relationships, both familial and love, are in a broken and horrid state. We have our beautiful people walking around sick; mentally ill from a litany of toxins....food, media, modern-day slavery. Even those with strong minds are struggling, unable to stay consistent with their true beliefs. The seeds that were sown in me are coming to harvest, and I am stronger, clearer, and more focused than Ive ever been. Its always been my belief that if we work from the inside out, not the other way around, we can reclaim our birthrights. I manifested things without giving deep thought, and we all have that capability. What can we accomplish by giving real attention, focus, and deep thought? I have been thinking about building a brand that helps us heal, which is no longer a thought, but an active progress. It feels true to me, like my home, like my mission. And its being built on all of the previous experiences Ive had, all of the people Ive been blessed to make contact with. I now see the purpose of it all. Their seeds have been planted in me to bear fruit to share with others. Through my healing journey of the past few months, I am finally at peace, content, and my anger has morphed into making change. I see beauty in everything. I dont want to preach, but I am making an active portal for those who seek and want to share knowledge. Our elders are passing, we have to pick up the torches and be the change we want to see. We are the healers, we are the saviors. The senses of sight, sound, and thought are our tools. If anyone made it this far, I humbly and gratefully thank you for reading.
Posted on: Thu, 29 May 2014 14:22:23 +0000
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