Its the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine. CNN founder Ted Turner has comissioned a final video to be aired in the event that this really is it. That China vs Japan, ISIS versus anyone fun, Russia vs anyone at all except Turkey and the death of 100 dollar oil have brought on the apocalypse. Three days ago Russia suddenly closed off the pipes to six countries giving Bulgaria less than five days of heat, this in the middle of January. Faced with the thought of fleeing St. Albert for the forests, everyone in my household has chosen to stay in the city and fight to the last. Its not so much a patriotic gesture as a solid hand shake to reality. Faced with no bottled water, gas fireplace, towel heater, food delivery, spa, egg whites in mini milk cartons, sushi, gym with mirrors, caramel Corettos with extra caffein shots, we unanimously chose death. After watching the Mad Max preview and American Sniper last night, Im experimenting with ideas involving leather clothes, BB guns, the sun roof on the SUV and me taking out terrorists as Andrea and the kids drive us downtown to loot the local best buy and sephora in the event its sayonara. If anyone has an escape plan involving a yacht and a chance at a new world, Im certainly open to a boat trip. This is CNN.
Posted on: Mon, 19 Jan 2015 11:17:42 +0000