Ive been very vocal lately about the fact that after I woke up from my Thyroidectomy on August 14th of this year, it was as if I had awaken in the body/mind of someone else and that I have no emotional connection to any event in my life before that date, save but two: a) my trip to Buffalo NY in April 2013 (just one of the reasons I am moving there in the next 1-5 years) and b) my stay in the psychiatric ward of Edmontons Royal Alexandra hospital in December 1997 (specifically, solitary confinement). After years of not talking about that month with any health professional, Im ready to go through the process & hard/smart work it will take to heal. Im realising that I have great sadness & anger in me from being forcibly held in solitary confinement at a time which I had committed no crime and was not outwardly violent, but only depressed and very much in need of human comfort. Im not sure I could get anyone who hasnt been in that situation to understand exactly what that treatment can do to a person, but quite frankly, I went in like a confused, directionless, purposeless, scared lamb and came out an angry, reactionary, violent, murderous lion, and have remained so for the past 16 years. I need help. And Im ready to talk about what happened & do the work to become at peace, because point blank, without fixing b, I cant permanently make a happen, and that is what I want more than anything in this world.
Posted on: Thu, 18 Dec 2014 20:27:52 +0000
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