Ive had a lot of messages roll in, and Im thankful it has been nothing but kindness. A lot of have you applied for... Or have you tried... Kind of suggestions too. I dont mind transparency, since I am asking for help, after all. James applied for disability 2 years ago and has been denied 3 times. Yes, he has a lawyer. Which is the problem, they didnt send supporting new information each time they appealed. A second, and third surgery may have made sense to SSD as to why we kept appealing. Yes, we fired them. We requested a hearing before a judge. In Febuary we received notice of that request, and have learned that it can take 12-18 months waiting. We are 7 months in. We can use the foreclosure notices to write a dire needs for a quicker process. But even if SSD gets granted (and we have to have faith that it will) it can take 90 days for them to get their ducks in a row and send us back pay for the last 2 years. Because James doesnt technically have a legal disabled status, we dont qualify for emergency programs with North Carolina Housing Authority. No one in our home meets their criteria. We applied for a forebarence with BB&T (our mortgage holder) and also a program that can reduce our interest rate to 1%, waited a 15 week process in 2013 for that. Just to be told that we have no income, no promise to them of how we can continue to pay our mortgage. We have made it this long for a few reasons: Tax return for 2012. James had partial year of income before he had to have surgery and was fired. So we were able to get by with our savings the rest of that year, until tax return season. We stretched our return for several months of mortgage payments. Then we got behind again. James has an Aflac Policy, so each time he had surgery in 2013, it paid a benefit for the hospitalizations (which were many that year) and we were able to get caught up again until the next tax season. Our church has also helped us out a few times in the years. But an ongoing need is a burden on a poor congregation that has many who are in need. So I turned to my friends, who many have said let us know how we can help. Let us know if you ever need anything. I knew if it came down to losing our home, they would have said April! You never said it was that tough! And so many of those friends have helped us, however the amount, I know it was with love and generosity. Others of those friends have not, and I havent been the least upset by that. Its easy to judge a persons situation, harder to sacrifice a little when it doesnt affect you, and thats ok. This trial has made me painfully aware of how self focused I was in my life when times were good. I thought that I was aware of others needs, and I know I found a way to help every time I was asked to help. I was generous. But I know now how much I didnt need then, and could have been even more charitable. And Im very sorry for that perspective I had. I grew up poor. I know how to have hard times. I know how to save during good times. Im resourceful and frugal. I have sold so many things we can part with, even down to my childrens beds so that we can pay a utility bill. I dont have cable. I bartered to get my hair cut. My children participate in programs that offer them generous scholarships. I dont have a gym membership, I dont get a pedicure. There are no extras like that. So when I hear my peers who do these extras (and it is great that they CAN) complain in any way about stress to afford other extras... Not gonna lie. It stings personally. Some people lack sensitivity. We do have state assistance for food and medical, Im grateful to be able to say that I dont have to worry about feeding my kids or affording my husbands medical care, when I know that there are many people who do worry. The amount that I set for a goal is for a few reasons: #1, This site takes fees. 8 cents to the dollar does add up. #2, We were 3 months behind on our mortgage payment, and they lovingly tack on late fees and a supposed property inspection fee every time we are in default. And we still have at least 6 months probable wait IF social security expedites our hearing. Longer if they dont. And #3, I knew it would cost money to print, to send, to pursue publishers interest once I start writing, and was anticipating the costs of that as well. This miracle I am praying for isnt to keep a luxurious lifestyle because Im afraid of hard work. Quite the opposite. Ive learned over the years how to clean a carburetor, repair my dryers heating element, build a fence, rewire electrical lighting fixtures, and fix a leaking washing machine. Because I cant pay for service. Im not afraid of hard work in the least. We have a small home in a rural area. We live very, very modestly. And Im ok answering all of these questions people have had, because I think people who dont know me deserve to know why I am asking for a hand up. May Heavenly Father bless all of you who have taken the time to come here, should you ever be in need of a miracle too. Much love, April
Posted on: Thu, 11 Sep 2014 16:25:59 +0000
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