Ive seen a fair share of gender related posts recently so I recalled an interesting explanation of one of the verses of Quran. Here it is: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women because of what Allah has preferred one with over the other and because of what they spend to support them from their wealth.” [TMQ An-Nisa, 34] The tafsir of this verse is very long, but I will just extract a little gem from it. Allah specifically uses the term qawwamuna, when describing the role of men. It comes from the root of qaf-waw-mim, meaning things such as standing firm, managed/established, stature/dignity/rank, etc. The tafsir mentions it is to manage the affairs and steer the course in a direction. If you reflect on this you realize it is in fact about being responsible, just like we are responsible for ourselves we then also become responsible for maintaining our household as we maintain ourselves, which is in a good manner. Brothers must comprehend the seriousness and weight of what this really means, you are now accountable for two human beings, not just one. And it means when you act, you have to act in a fair manner even when it comes to your own self (ie not managing yourself well but forgetting her)! Whats even more interesting is Allah later in the verse uses the term qaanitaatun coming from the root qaf-nun-ta, meaning to be devout, wholeheartedly. In other words, the stress here is in the relationship based on love and compassion, and it comes out of willingness and not coercion! As a husband brothers simply need to focus on earning respect through the relationship and the rest will come willfully and wholeheartedly from the practicing Muslimah. Note that Allah did not use the fil of amr (verb of command/imperative) here. Again, this highlights that what is maintained here of a relationship is natural! Allah is teaching us of the innate human psychology and the method to have a real relationship, and again brothers should take note Finally, Allah contrasts what is righteous with rebellious. In tafsir it is described as standing in a high place to declare mutiny, which is open defiance of leadership. So Allah is separating here, that if one wishes to be amongst the righteous, one would not have the trait of rebelliousness when it comes to the family institution, but rather as stated earlier the devotion comes wholeheartedly. This is a matter from which sisters would take note, to maintain a single bound family home. In practice if we were truly sincere in our hearts maintaining this would not be very difficult. However, perhaps with the influences of our environment, our experience, and other things we have become jaded and negative. That is why we as Muslims should never forget the mercy of Allah and the hope he gives us of the future =).
Posted on: Sat, 23 Aug 2014 06:05:58 +0000
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