I’m on vacation at a cabin on a lake in Idaho. Here are some observations on that, specifically, as well as vacations in general: 1. I have no cellphone service, but I do have high-speed internet here; however, it is DSL, and that is as close to roughing it as I get. You can go camping out in the woods if that’s your idea of fun, but I like watching Netflix and taking hot showers, so… 2. When you are away from work for a long time, you always say that you hope they’ll be fine without you, but, of course, you don’t really hope that at all. How bad would it be to be gone and have things go smoothly (worse yet, better) while you were gone? 3. Many people remember to set up an out-of-office reply for their email or phone while they are gone, but this is not enough. I like to set up a few random crises to occur while I am gone so that my absence will be noted and I will be missed (see point # 2). By my calculations, a SWAT team should be kicking in the door of a co-worker right now because of an anonymous tip that she runs a human trafficking ring. Too bad I wasn’t there to bail her out! 4. I have been able to answer a riddle/paradox that many have contemplated for years: if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, I don’t care. 5. Whisky was invented because staring at a lake sober isn’t very fun. 6. TV was invented because you will eventually run out of whisky. 7. It takes a few days to really unwind, be still, and get in touch with your inner self. Turns out my inner self is an asshole (kind of like my outer self). 8. Wildlife is incredibly territorial. Each morning, I have to go back out and pee on the trees at the property edge to reclaim my space. 9. I don’t like spending this much time with my family. We don’t look at all like the family on the Yahtzee box. 10. Speaking of Yahtzee… Did I really pay $20 for a cup and some dice? Really?!?
Posted on: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 18:21:28 +0000
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