Janes Story from Beyond Blue Online Forum I lost all my interest with life, with people, with my family. It was as if I was slowly sliding down the hill. I tried to focus a lot on my baby, my daughter, but as the days went past, it was like the darkness was starting to creep in and eventually, it got to a point where I didnt wanna get out of bed. No one understood what I was going through, people were saying things like, Yes, its difficult to be a mum. A first-time mum, its always hard. But in my heart, I knew that it shouldnt have to be that hard. I just couldnt sleep. Like there would be this internal, almost like a clock that just kept ticking away and that sort of escalated into panic attacks. I was very overwhelmed, and I thought, I need help, but I feel trapped. Life was just too hard to live, I just dont want to be here anymore, I just didnt want to be on this earth anymore. Probably, from a mothers perspective, I felt... Because I was feeling just so disgusted with myself, that I felt my children deserved a better parent. And I look at my daughter and the guilt really kicked in, and I thought, Well, shes such a beautiful little baby, I couldnt have asked for a healthier little baby and yet, why am I feeling like this? It started off one morning when I just could not get out of bed. I was lying under the covers, and I heard my little pitter-patter of footsteps as my children ran into the bedroom to try and wake me up. And I looked at them, and they said to me, Mummy, Mummy, wake up, we want you to wake up. And that was my lifeline. I mustered up whatever was left of me on the inside, and I managed to get out of the bed, and made an appointment to see my GP. Lots of bumps and hurdles along the way, so I dont know if Id call it smooth, but the outcome was a very positive outcome. My advice would be, Dont be afraid, come out of your shell and speak up because there is help out there.
Posted on: Thu, 21 Nov 2013 00:06:15 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015