John Cleese of Monty Python at the end of his speech on Creativity: Well, that really is all I can tell you that wont help you to be creative. Everything. And now, in the two minutes left, I can come to the important part, and that is, how to stop your subordinates {from} becoming creative too, which is the real threat. Because, believe me no one appreciates better than I do what trouble creative people are. And how they stop decisive, hard-nosed bastards like us from running businesses efficiently. I mean, we all know, {if} we encourage someone to be creative, the next thing is theyre rocking the boat, coming up with ideas, and asking us questions. Now if we dont nip this kind of thing in the bud, well have to start justifying our decisions by reasoned argument. And sharing information -- the concealment of which gives us considerable advantages in our power struggles. So, heres how to stamp out creativity in the rest of the organization and get a bit of respect going. One: Allow subordinates no humor, it threatens your self-importance and especially your omniscience. Treat all humor as frivolous or subversive. Because subversive is, of course, what humor will be in your setup, as its the only way that people can express their opposition, since (if they express it openly) youre down on them like a ton of bricks. So lets get this clear: blame humor for the resistance that your way of working creates. Then you dont have to blame your way of working. This is important. And I mean that solemnly. Your dignity is no laughing matter. Second: keeping ourselves feeling irreplaceable involves cutting everybody else down to size, so dont miss an opportunity to undermine your employees confidence. A perfect opportunity comes when youre reviewing work that theyve done. Use your authority to zero in immediately on all the things you can find wrong. Never never balance the negatives with positives, only criticize, just as your school teachers did. Always remember: praise makes people uppity. Third: Demand that people should always be actively doing things. If you catch anyone pondering, accuse them of laziness and/or indecision. This is to starve employees of thinking time because that leads to creativity and insurrection. So demand urgency at all times, use lots of fighting talk and war analogies, and establish a permanent atmosphere of stress, of breathless anxiety, and crisis. In a phrase: keep that mode closed. In this way we no-nonsense types can be sure that the tiny, tiny, microscopic quantity of creativity in our organization will all be ours! But! Let your vigilance slip for one moment, and you could find yourself surrounded by happy, enthusiastic, and creative people whom you might never be able to completely control ever again! So be careful. Thank you, and good night. Thank you.
Posted on: Sat, 26 Apr 2014 19:31:18 +0000
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