Judge: You are here today concerning thirty-four alleged counts of cannibalism. How do you plead? Dryer: Not guilty. Random Sock: PULL HIS PLUG! Random Church sock: THIS IS NOT WHAT GOD WANTS! Judge not lest you also be judged! Judge: *bangs gavel* ORDER! ORDER! Dryer, you chose to represent yourself. Now is the time. Dryer: *stands before the court* Why would I sully my livelihood by devouring my clients? I see hundreds of thousands of clothes each year. If something were to happen to them, Id be the first to be accused and suspected. Not to mention Ive seen my fair share of shirts, blouses, underwear, panties and pants without incident. Why specifically socks? Ive been searched up and down, and nothing was found. These accusations are ludicrous and without merit. Please. I just want to walk away from this. Judge: There will be a short recess while the jury makes their decision. *recess ends* Judge: Has the jury reached a verdict? Jury: Yes, we have, Your Honor. We, the jury, find the defendant... not guilty. *courtroom full of socks erupts in an uproar of disbelief* *later in the hall, news reporters rush with their cameras to interview dryer, shouting questions. From out of nowhere, a sock appears holding a gun* Sock: This is for my mother, you devil! *shoots dryer right in the chest* *chaos ensues and reporters scatter and panic as dryer drops to the ground* Sock: *stands over dryer, pointing the gun at him* Any last words? Dryer: *grins weakly* Your m-mother... was... delicious. *laughs wildly* Sock: *unloads another shot in dryers chest* *slowly drops the weapon, kneels to the ground and puts hands behind his head as police come to arrest him*
Posted on: Fri, 26 Dec 2014 16:17:27 +0000
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