LONG BEACH ON LINE NEWSPAPER CALLED THE PATCH WANTS ME TO GO ON STAGE TO TELL MY STORY BELOW....LOL....IT IS FOR THE MOST PART TRUE...I CREATED IT OUT OF DAILY AND WEEKLY EMAILS TO MY SISTER MARY AND MY BEST FRIEND BRUCE MOORE WHO HAVE BEEN VERY ENTERTAINED AND WANTED TO GET MORE MICE AND TURN THEM LOSE IN MY APARTMENT SO THAT I COULD KEEP THEM AMUSED....I SUBMITTED THE STORY AS A JOKE IN A COMPETITION....TURNS OUT THE JOKE IS ON ME....THEY LIKED IT....LOL.. I can not find a woman to move in with me so a mouse I guess felt sorry for me and decided to move in one warm night last summer. He or she must have come under the screen door to my place when I left the front door open one warm evening. Anyway, it scared the living hell out of me a few times. First I went to my front closet...and it ran across the clothes rack where my suits and other clothes were hung up and I think I jumped out of my shorts...LOL....it jumped and managed to get out of the closet before I did....lol...and I had no idea where it went. I bought some traps and put them out but being a nice guy they were ones to just catch it...NOT KILL IT....I put them out with some cheese etc.....nothing...no mouse and I did not see it for a few days...so I thought maybe it found a way out of the place on its own and I would not have to capture it and turn it lose some place. One night, I am in bed with my heating pad because I had pulled a muscle and the pad was up near my head. About 5 AM in the oh dark hours I reached for the pad half asleep to put over the pulled muscle because it was bothering me. I flipped the pad up and upon doing so.....something small and furry with little feet landed on my bare chest and ran for it across my chest......LOL.....I flew out of the bed and flipped all the lights on and started moving my covers around and looked under the bed and through out the place....NO FRIGGIN MOUSE TO ME FOUND.....I went back to bed thinking perhaps I was dreaming. The sun comes up and so I think I will pull my bedding off to make sure there was no mouse there....just to be safe...and in my bed on my formally clean sheets was evidence that the little sucker must have been sleeping with me for a while.....all over my sheets under the covers....LOL...He/she had to be climbing the cord to the heating pad to get in bed.....it was sleeping with me....yuck.....LOL...it must have slept on the heating pad or found a way under the covers at night. So now I am really mad and go get more traps and a couple that would kill it.....NO MORE MISTER NICE GUY... I bought the spring kind and read that they like peanut butter.....so I proceed to make peanut butter and crackers for it......and place it on the spring traps.....only to snap the hell out of my fingers.....but I get them set finally after much cursing LOL...and placed..... and I go to bed and hear snap...go out to the living room to look.....and the trap sprung but no mouse but the crackers I made to catch it are gone...LOL.....this goes on for months.....the damn thing was climbing the cords on my desk and leaving its opinions about my legal work all over my desk and on my papers.....LOL....I would clean it all off and get even madder.....so I get more traps.....my place is a danger zone now with traps all over the place...I manage to step on the sticky ones and catch myself but not the mouse....LOL... I like to read and so every night I would lay in bed and turn the light on and read....this little sucker is getting brave....it would come to the door where I could see it...and make a dash for my dresser to get under it......and I would fly out of bed...but could not get there in time....I would lift the dresser and pull more muscles and the thing would run out under my legs...LOL...so now I get rid of all the nice traps...I was going to turn it lose if I caught it...NO MORE NICE GUY....My friend tells me that I should by some peanuts with chocolate...that mice love those so I go to store to find some and nothing in grocery stores so I go to Sees Candies and buy a small box of chocolate covered peanuts.......my mind is elsewhere and the person at the counter with all kinds of women and a few men around asks me if this is for my girl friend and I come back with" no it is for the mouse "....LOL....before I could explain some guy pops off...you are suppose to catch it ...NOT DATE IT....lol.......I said good one...real funny...and I bet my face was beet red.....LOL Well, I finally got him or her ....set a trap where when it tried to run for my dresser it would have to hit the trap and it did one night....No more mouse...my sister and best friend want to get me more because I kept them amused for months with stories about my attempts to catch the critter.....LOL
Posted on: Thu, 26 Sep 2013 16:29:56 +0000
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