Last Part of #Crush I did dress up well. Unfortunately it was raining and was windy at the same time. Damn! Everything worked against me. My umbrella didn’t open. I was fully wet. This was not enough. There was some more. The roads were filled with large puddles. I don’t understand what fun drivers of school van get on riding on these puddles. So a school van passed me by splashing water on me. Agh! My whole dress had turned black. I hated this. I thought I could impress him. Sadly, he had pity look on me. I had to go back home and wear clean clothes. I promised myself that I will impress him by being me. Next day, I met him with a strong mission on mind- first make him my friend and then propose him. Simple, right. Things don’t look so simple as they are. Every time I think of talking to him, I would end up without words. At last I spoke to him. It was a friendly chat. I got to know his name was Vivian. He was a theatre artist. The only passion for him was acting. We became quite good buddies. The numbness in me reduced though feelings for him increased. Uru asked me how far have our relationship reached. I said,“ I haven’t told him yet. We are just friends now. When time is right, I will tell him.” “ What! You haven’t told him yet. It’s three months already. When will you tell him? What time are you waiting for? You know him. You are kinda friends with him. So tell him. Don’t wait” she said. “How can a girl propose a guy like that? I mean won’t it look desperate.” I asked. “Dumb head, which generation are you in? You don’t have to wait. When such opportunities arise, grab for it.” she said. It took lot of time for me to decide on telling my feelings like how, when and where. Next day, I went on with plan B- go for it. It was beautiful sunny morning. He hadn’t arrived yet. I relaxed and took deep breathes. Finally, he came. But this time he was not alone. He was accompanied by another guy. He was cheerful as always. He greeted me hi and started our usual chat. I thought whether it was right time to tell him. So I recalled about what Uru said- don’t wait. “ Vivan….” I said and then he interrupted me. “I know what you want to ask” he said. I was overjoyed by knowing that he knows what I was going to say. He caught hold of his friend’s hand and said, “ Sorry for my impoliteness. This is my fiancé Rahul. Rahul, this is Shireen.” I was dumbstruck. “ What ! Fiancé” I said to myself. Unfortunately it was too loud for Vivian to hear. “Oh! I am gay” he said. “Sorry.” I said softly. I wanted to burst out and sing ‘we are never ever getting back together’. I controlled myself. My whole world came crashing down. I wanted to hit myself. I didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry. It took me one year to overcome all this. I cried sometimes. Later I understood , I couldn’t change it. He liked guys and I liked him. But I can’t force him into liking me. Now we are best of buddies. We hang around and have fun. Best part of our friendship is that he knows what I used to feel for him and we laugh on it too. I am over him now and have found my new object of affection – Hugh Jackman. Until I find my true love, he’s my dream guy. Guess this is called moving on and having fun.
Posted on: Mon, 29 Dec 2014 11:19:24 +0000
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