Late Night thoughts. This transitioning into marriage mindset is an interesting thing. I moved to Jacksonville about 6yrs ago because I realized that I didnt have any positive marriages around me to really learn from. I knew married couples. But most had issues and compromise. And the closest one was my Dad and stepmom. Growing up, I knew I wanted to be married. But not like the marriage they had when I was younger. There were too many arguments. It seemed like they Had to be together, instead of Wanting to be together. Thankfully thats changed. When I see pictures of them smiling together.. Or her resting her head on his shoulder, it makes me smile. But it definitely caused a hesitation. Plus I was having a great time with women. But I knew one day I needed to slow down if I planned to get married. In my friendships I was selective. I understood that associations brought about similarities. That if I looked at my 5 closest relationships.. Our income would be within 10% of one another. So I made sure to surround myself with ppl who were going places. But I moved to Jacksonville because i knew the same would be in my marriage. If I hung around ppl who cheated on their wife.. No one would hold me accountable. If I hung around ppl who didnt treat their wife good.. Neither would I. Regardless of my intentions. Interesting how since I made the move my want tos and get tos have changed. Things that I used to love doing.. Seem very awkward to me. I feel out of place in places, and enviornments that I felt right at home. I never thought that most ppl who end up in marriages that they question, went into it thinking they would be in that place. So I decided to prepare. I see people go to school, and work hard at their craft.. But seem like they think marriage and parenting skills would come through some type of osmosis. Or their would be a switch that would magically click on when they found the right person. So instead of waiting on the right person, I decided to work on becoming the person for someone. Being extremely successful in business, but unsuccessful in my family, never seemed appealing to me. So I tried to put more energy into becoming a good husband, before I found a wife. In our upbringing we are typically taught that a husband is a husband when he says I do. But I read one time that The one who finds a wife finds what is enjoyable, and receives a pleasurable gift from the LORD. Well I knew that I wasnt looking for another mans wife. So if she could be a wife before I found her... Then I could be a husband that found her. But if she is my favor, and a pleasurable gift... What did she get from the husband who found her? I heard my Pastor say once that he never wants his wife to sit and think, in her alone time, and wonder if she made a mistake. That he wants her to walk between the raindrops of life. I like that. Thats what I want her to have. A man who wants that for her.
Posted on: Mon, 05 May 2014 05:01:39 +0000
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