Letter from the Editor, Represent Entertainment Magazine Now folks, we’re gonna have to talk about this Mars thing for a minute….and basically my take on it….and yours…because really, it all boils down to one simple thing….4 people on a one way trip….no coming home….that’s it…..and goodnight Gracie…..we’re off to build a colony ….a wonderful colony on Mars (please sing that last part in the melody of: “we’re off to see the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of Oz”…it fits….don’t act like it doesn’t)…… history in the making….huge step for all mankind….blah blah blah…..this isn’t what concerns me…..100,000 people have already signed up….this is not what concerns me…..you see….in the movies, the chosen 4 people are always ridiculously beautiful but in real life……THAT’S another story… Four people for the rest of your life…actually three cause duh, you’re the fourth…..all day…every day…living in what I’m pretty sure would be the equivalent living space of my closet…..let’s not gloss over the SEVEN MONTH TRIP THERE…..yeah, folks, seven months….in a capsule….together…all day…everyday…..(makes me feel homicidal already)….can you honestly think of ANYBODY……and I mean ANYBODY that you would want to spend this much time with? (besides your dog…the only sane choice would BE your dog)….even IF you could choose Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt for that matter, I’m thinking after about day FOUR I’d be ready to get the hell out of there….(Listen, Brad, its been fun but I swear to Christ if I see your face for one more minute I’m gonna pull a Lizzie Borden here)…..now I want you all to pause for a moment and think of that ONE person, the one person that every time they walk through the door you silently groan….don’t act like you don’t have one (or several)…..the jokester….the “know it all”….the perv….pick one, any one, cause we all have a few….now imagine begin stuck with that person for the REST OF YOUR GOD GIVEN LIFE IN A CLOSET!!....ugh…the thought alone makes me shudder…..and a HUNDRED THOUSAND PEOPLE HAVE ALREADY APPLIED TO DO THIS?....who ARE these people?....the only thing I can think of is perhaps they are the “one”….you know….your “one”….cause you know you’d be all happy and excited to be chosen and then THAT guy would walk through the door…..(justifiable homicide….how DO they enforce the law in space?.....”AJ, now let go of his air hose….try to be reasonable …we still have 6 months left on this ship and if you kill him the body is gonna smell”)…..the people I LOVE THE MOST grate on my nerves after about 3 hours…..I ADORE my children but when they all come over after a couple hours I’m ready for them to GO…..if I get irritated I just go outside with my dogs….oh, sorry, THAT’S NOT AN OPTION folks, there is no OUTSIDE….unless spontaneous combustion was on your to do list this afternoon…(laundry ? check….answer emails? check…..spontaneously combust? check)…sigh… maybe it’s just me…. the whole world is excited about this Mars thing…..me?....I’m pretty sure I’d rather eat glass…… Represent Entertainment Magazine does not condone singing “We’re off to see the Wizard”…..any type of homicide spontaneous combustion or eating glass….that is all…..
Posted on: Mon, 12 Aug 2013 21:27:54 +0000