"Levels of Life" is the most acurate description of the pulverising nature of grief. My favourite passage, which I wish I had sent to all my friends who were so woefully lacking in support when my mother died, is: "And this is where the Silent Ones cause further offence. They do not understand (how could they?) that they have a new function in your life. You need your friends not just as friends, but also as corroborators. The chief witness to what has been your life is not silenced, and retrospective doubt is inevitable. So you need them to tell you, however glancingly, however unintendingly, that what you once were - the two of you - was seen. Not just known from within but seen from without: witnessed, corroborated, and remembered with an accuracy of which you are yourself currently incapable." My mother died two months after my marriage to Andrew - I lost my mother; he lost his wife, then I lost my husband. The last two years we have been wrestling with love and grief. Intimacy and loss. Mrs Wizard
Posted on: Tue, 10 Sep 2013 09:09:51 +0000
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