Look Americans! I know you want to buy cheap clothes. And I know that those cheap clothes work fine for you. But you are all morons and your choices are just not good enough for your well being and best look. So you must trust the MUCH SMARTER people in government to make those choices now. See, your cheap clothes do not wash well. The clothes break down much faster. You could end up naked if your clothes do not cover you the way you had hoped. So to fix this atrocity of you having free choice and free decisions to buy these horrible cheap clothes, we are going to immediately pass a law that you can only buy clothes from high end stores like Nordstorm, Neiman Marcus or Bloomingdales. You may not know it now, but we are looking out for your best interest by forcing you into much higher quality fabrics that will last longer and perform much better. TRUST US, we the government only pass laws that benefit you and we all know that designer clothes ONLY law will make this world and your self-esteem MUCH better. You say you cannot afford it? Well, dont worry. We will just tax you and then give you a portion back to help you pay for these new high quality clothes! You will be thanking us in a few years, even if you hate us today! This is in your best interest! Next we will choose what food you can eat and ban the rest. Because we also know what is right for you and why should the American people be accountable or responsible for any of their personal choices when the government can do a much better job!!
Posted on: Fri, 15 Nov 2013 00:41:46 +0000