MARRIAGE AS A COVENANT RELATIONSHIP. One of the greatest mistakes that many people make regarding marriage is that they do not know what they are committing themselves to. When you get married you get into a covenant. You may be taught prior to getting married but you will never have a full appreciation until you get into marriage. Marriage is not something that should be taken lightly for whatever reason. The world today has ridiculed it and divorce is rampant not only in the world but also in the church. It has ceased to have the sacredness that it was upheld in the days gone by. The main reason is that people think of it as a contract not a covenant. The understanding of covenant has been lost in our generation. The moment that you say your vows things change in that instant. One of the greatest changes that takes place is that your body is not your own and your life ceases to be your own. Whereas in the days gone by you could just walk out the house and do as you please now there is another person to consider. Decisions cannot be made on a whim but have to made in consultation. Your life is no longer your own. You have to change when you get married. You cannot just walk into marriage and walk out. One of the greatest lessons I had of covenant was a story of a man whose wife passed away because she would continuously nose bleed. When that situation got worse and was hospitalized because of that nasal hemorrhaging that man stood by his wife daily. He got the necessary days off to be with her in hospital every day. Every time people would go to the hospital they would not fail to see him with his wife. Till the day that she went to be with the Lord her husband was with her. This man realized that he was in a covenant with his spouse and so should you when you are married. Life will always throw these opportunities to test your covenant keeping abilities. You will have that opportunities [yes many of them] to break that relationship and throw it away. At that time one of you should have the sense to fight for that relationship because you are in a covenant.In most cases of divorce there is someone faithful to the covenant. It is my firm belief that this thing that divorce is by mutual content is a lie. There is always someone who still wants to keep that thing going and is willing to fight for it with his/her all. There is usually still one person who wants to give it a shot and fight for the marriage. This is the attitude that I believe we have lost in this generation: the will to fight for something we believe in. We have bought into the lie that when a marriage is broken it has to be thrown away and cannot be mended. Get another one while you are at it.Every marriage has to be fought for no matter the circumstances. Everyone who is married should mend what has been broken because one way or the other he/she is responsible. Take responsibility for your actions and your marriage. FOUR FACETS OF COVENANT LIVING. 1. God has to be at the center of your marriage. Many people take it for granted that God has to be at the center of a marriage. You need to go through what many people go through to get a spouse only then will you appreciate the wisdom of God I keeping your spouse for you.Many of us want to have things our own way as regards to marriage to the extent of going against our consciences. When we do many of us get hurt and for some it is irreparable damage to our souls. You just have to see a person wounded by a failed relationship to understand that God needs to be at the center. He should initiate the romance.When we let God be the center of your love life He will make sure that you get the right spouse. When you do, the life you live will manifest His grace both spiritually and physically. You will get a spouse whose life will inspire you to a better walk with God. 2. It involves two different people- you and your spouse are not the same and have to be different. When a covenant is cut two people bring two strengths into a mutually beneficial arrangement. These strengths become what makes the whole greater than the sum of the individuals. If you were the same then there is no need to have the other as a partner.In marriage the greatest challenges stem from the fact that we are different. Many people do not know how to reconcile the two. We have to come to the understanding that our masculine and feminine characteristics complement each other.People will change over time more so women after child birth but you cannot change and refuse to be with her. This is where you need to be a person of covenant and keep your word. We need to be covenant keepers and stand by the promises we gave. 3. It requires us to change- because you are in covenant we need to change to accommodate your spouse. Many people have shipwrecked their marriages because they are unwilling to change. In many cases these changes need to be about the way that we view the world and Christians in general. You cannot run a relationship with radical Christian beliefs for it will surely destroy the marriage. While there is nothing wrong with being radical it is the persistent radicalism that causes problems. It is a stage in the life of every believer but we need to come to a place where we are sober and realize you need to get out of that stage. There is no way that you can do these things forever.I know of many men who have destroyed their relationships and marriages because they want to run them like military barracks. You need to change and come back to the center. Some of the theories many of us held do not work because they are not practical.Reali ze that you are in a new relationship and you are in a new experience different from your radical views. Your definitions of spirituality do not work in a relationship and your radical ideas will have to be thrown out. Most of the radical Christians need to be sober and need to learn to handle a spouse. They need to change lest they become a casualty of life. 4. You need the advice of the witnesses to the marriage covenant [PROVERBS 1114]. While many of us put on a facade that all is well we need to realize that what you go through in relationships and marriage is not unique to you. For this reason there is a cloud of witnesses here on earth that can help you out of that fix. Even more so many people just do not ask anyone to aid in the problems. We easily forget that this is the reason many of us were witnesses at your wedding. We as the witnesses are there to encourage you when you hit rough patches. There is nothing new about the experiences we go through. It is my firm belief that all things being equal men will all behave in a similar way in the same situations. The same is true for women. This is why it’s important to seek advice and because there is nothing new about what you are going though in your marriage. Counsel will help you to keep covenant as what you may view as a mountain in marriage will be merely a molehill in the presence of godly counsel.As I close I want you as a believer to commit to a life of covenant. We need to be covenant keepers and stand by the promises we gave. Make it a point for you and your house you will keep covenant.
Posted on: Thu, 25 Jul 2013 08:04:22 +0000
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