ML Musings: Im back!!! Ive decided to bore you with another one of my long-ass posts. Hahahaha! You thought you were rid of them for awhile, right? Lol. Ok so forget about some of my recent lovely pics, I have to confess that I am having one of the worst years ever! Hmmm so most of you were raving about how good my golden streaked hair looks on my profile picture, but lately Ive been having a hard time even keeping a smile on my face.... :-( Ironic as it may sound, I think my recent smiles have only been for cameras because its been very difficult for me to endure what life entails for me. I seem to be struggling in EVERY ASPECT of my life.... From children, to my mum, to my friendships, personal and professional friendships and relationships to business.... you name it!!! Its the kind of problems that no one can really solve for you, so its not as if I can even go and share them all day with Mame Kosi Erzuah or others because there simply is no key! Im only talking about this here today coz 1. I love to write and 2. I love to give a realistic picture of what is really going on with me whenever I start getting loads of comments about how great my PICTURES look... Maybe I can inspire someone that pays attention to my page, that Im equally as human as they are with a common struggle! You see, I believe that we are all inextricably linked in life... Do not be fooled, no person in life has it rosy and wonderful all the time because we are mere mortals! So I am writing this post as Im being driven to the office and Im wondering what one can do when they feel like they are literally drowning in a sea of troubles? (Pun intended) Believe it or not, but I have been disappointed the most by my business affiliations.... How could I have built such an elaborate network only to be let down? It just doesnt add up... Then I have enormous questions about motherhood and the fact that its becoming an arduous task keeping up with my mother-daughter relationship too. Oh life! But there is this famous picture that inspires me when Im down: Its a simple picture of a feeble cat that goes to the MIRROR for confidence, because ONLY in that mirror can she see herself as a powerful roaring lion.... Just like the cat, I looked in the mirror and decided to roar today (smile) I couldnt even bother putting any make-up on when I found it difficult to smile back at my reflection this morning... So roaring for me meant that I would prepare myself to write a few of my thoughts down coz writing gives me hope.... I always feel a cathartic release when I write (so yes, forgive me for yet another long post) but I couldnt help it lol So yesterday, I spoke to a dear friend of mine that Ive known for at least 30 years and I explained why Ive been QUIET lately.... Ok I wont post her full name here coz unlike Kosi, she may collapse lol but Sau is doing big things and she invited me to appear on her new TV show coz shes filming next week.... Can you believe that I said NO even though she loves my big mouth? Like the metaphorical feeble cat, I explained that I didnt have the confidence to speak up vehemently on social issues on TV when things are going so bad for me. My dear was highly disappointed but she listened to me as I poured out a few of my unsolvable problems to her. We spoke for under 20 minutes during the rainy night, but I could feel her love and understanding during the call... She laughed with me, sympathized with me and she told me she wanted her bubbly, happy-go-lucky, fearless and passionate sister back and by the time the call ended, I felt like roaring (smile). I decided last night that I will story shutting down... I love you, Sau and all the best with your TV production dreams!!! Thank you for making me feel like a lion last night.... So conclusively, since Im at the office now, all I want to say is that I may not feel like a lion every day but with your help, Ill be fine. Its so tough but if youre feeling like me and dont know where to turn, just think of my words and take a mirror... You too can transform yourself and start to roar eventually..... Ill try and find a similar image of the metaphorical picture on the net and upload on my fb page soon. Sorry to everyone that feels let down by my silence. Have a blessed day and I hope this post brings a smile to your face too coz its just brought one to mine :-) :-) :-) Much Love!
Posted on: Tue, 20 May 2014 10:35:34 +0000
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