MONDAY 16/09/13 KEEP YOUR MARRIAGE, KEEP YOUR HOME, AND KEEP YOUR JOB. (Do not be a superwoman, rush to your grave with less speed). A number of homes are shattered now due to lack of woman’s attention in the home. Keeping the home is usually the responsibility of the woman. The man may want to assist if need be but it is established that keeping the home is the woman’s duty. We all have equal rights and responsibilities when it comes to building and keeping the homes but more blames fall on our women when the building of the homes fail. Keeping the home and taking care of the children to a large extent is the concern of the woman. Today, major economic challenges and all of the major bills has become a cross where unlike before; in the days of our Dads the men can single handedly carry. More of our women are now employed in some office works or are engaged in certain business enterprise. Reasons, Dad’s income as sweet as it may seem unfortunately cannot pay all of the bills any longer. As tough an assignment this may seem, it is possible for a good woman to retain her job, keep her marriage and still keep her home. The truth is that most women do not like to be superwoman. Let us be realistic, it is only a superwoman who can perform all of her roles in her work place and at home and be a success in her marriage. IT IS ONLY A SUPERWOMAN. Some of my friends who are men will agree with me that most of our women are stronger than us or how do we describe a situation where we both arrived home from the hurdles and the heavy traffic and we just walk into the bedroom, fall on the bed and give that order, sweetheart I hope my dinner will be ready the next 5minutes! How selfish, as we have forgotten that we were both tortured by the heavy traffic. We wouldn’t keep her company in the kitchen to help get this dinner ready, we just needed the rest, now who is the superman, who is the superwoman? The kids are so very young; they cannot do any of the household chores. Mummy wakes up very early in the morning, she bathes the kids, and she does the cooking and washes some of the dishes before going to work and may even need to drop the kids at school on her way to work. She gets to work in all of the hurdles and the heavy traffic and is faced with various files she must attend to before the board or the management meeting. The loads of work are much that she does not even have the time to go for break. She closes from work and has to drive again through that heavy traffic back home and when she finally gets home, she is expected to do the cooking again and feed her kids, bathes them and tucks them into bed before daddy comes back and when dad finally comes and finish his meal, Dad wants to do a little bit of press up before going to sleep, for those who know what I mean. NOW, WHO IS THE SUPERWOMAN? YOU CAN MANAGE THESE SITUATIONS RIGHT: (a) Keeping your marriage: Marriage takes two persons. It takes you and your spouse, nobody else. Making your marriage work requires a positive contribution by you and your spouse. It takes nobody else. Not even your children. It takes some loving and some energy to keep an affair; it takes extra pain and efforts and responsibility to make a marriage work. In whatever you do, this person comes first. Every other thing, every other person follows. They come after this person. You don’t compromise this person for anything. Never allow for any communication gap between you two. At times of argument, quarrels and misunderstanding make sure issues are resolved and very quickly too. You know, at times we quarrel just to know each other better. It is only bad when after this quarrel, things do not get better. A FEW TIPS TO KEEPING YOUR MARRIAGE: (1) Wake up, pray together and learn to say I LOVE YOU thereafter. (2) Let this person know he comes before anything else in your life…LET HIM KNOW. Don’t just assume this in the inside of you. (3) You see a person in an outfit and it sweeps you off your feet, get similar kit for your spouse instead of falling in love with another. (4) Call during work hours and pass dirty and naughty jokes. (5) Make him look up to hurrying home to your meals and your arms. (6) Learn to say you are sorry even if you are right. (7) Share quality times with him. Never forget to trill him with that which he enjoyed most before your marriage. (8) Make him feel important and more intelligent than he is, men love to be flattered, I am a man and I know how this feels. It takes the grace of God and absolutely a very understanding partner who is your best friend to keep your marriage. A good husband sees all of your daily assignment and sees these work loads as too much for his darling wife. He therefore likes to sit you down on the best means to manage all of this stress. Then the second factor comes in: (b)Keeping your home: When we talk a home, we have gone beyond the marriage issue now. We are bringing in a third party. The third party might be your kids, your relatives or your maids. How you manage this people who I call the intruders in your marriage is your own style. There is division of labour in all that we do. A woman cannot continue to play superwoman or I see her moving speedily to her grave. What she does is bring in a helper, either by way of a nanny, a house help or a relative. She plans these challenges with her hubby. Do we bring in a relative to live with us? Relatives can be too dangerous to keep in our homes as most of them are so envious of us nothing we do for them we have done well. They just want to be like us and that they want to do very fast. They forget that fact that they just came in from the village and are not educated; and even if they are, they are not as experienced, not as exposed. Nothing we do pleases them. Do we hire a house help? The house help thing is a contract where we agree to pay up this person at the end of every month or every year, still they expect more from us. Once they have come in and are a bit used to our system, the confidence starts to creep in and they have started to compare themselves with our kids. Some of them do not even appreciate when we put them in a school as they must go to that same school our kids are going forgetting that you never mentioned as part of the wages, the schooling advantage. If we because of some of these challenges opt to do all of the domestic activities by ourselves, we are speedily moving to resting in peace. We just can’t manage these challenges as what we had expected and our minds are prepared for when it eventually happens, we can manage and control easily. We do not say because of the troubles that come with accommodating these people, we should continue to play the superwoman; it is dangerous especially to our health. Other challenges are people not believing in you. Some might even call you a liar. Your relatives, your colleagues at work, surprisingly your kids and your husband too on different occasions and for various reasons. Count it all joy as long as you are truthful and you believe in yourself and the heavens trusts and believe in you. It takes a courageous person to handle issues of mistrust. To succeed in life, you got many rivers to cross. Be strong and be you. It is therefore advisable that you shed some of these your domestic activities for this third party to manage while you cater for that which is directly your responsibility; your hubby. The areas of cooking and some more intimate activities. If you have scheduled all your activities right in the home, managing yourself at the office or your work place is no big deal any longer. Leave the rest to God. (b) Keeping your Job: When your head is clear of all the stress and all domestic problems, you are bound to think right. Managing all of your activities in your work place becomes easier and of course your performance and production output is excellent. You are at your best in everything you do. Whatever we preach here, you become a part of us and you reason right. Your hubby gets the best of you, your colleagues in business gets the best of you, even your bosses and subordinates at your work place and your children too. Please less of the SUPERWOMAN ego, reschedule your activities and be the best product to all those who need you. We thank you for your time today and please remember to plan and manage these ember months well. We are sorry we could not come up on this platform last week Monday. Our location then and the internet reception was a challenge. Sorry for the inconvenience. Time to play: You know, watching the African groove on MTN project fame some weeks back made me proud of Nigeria. Africa is beautiful. Clear Crystal voices. Everyday, everyone and every aspect of us has improved and is improving. The competition is so tense, and everyone is so full of energy and everyone is getting better by the day. I wonder if you are moving with the tide. Join our group: Like us on BUSINESS ENTERPRISE WITH OLONADE ABRAHAM OLUFEMI. Share ideas on business and other activities as it affects our lives. Simply type BUSINESS ENTERPRISE WITH OLONADE ABRAHAM OLUFEMI on the friends search column on your facebook page and like us. You then continue to follow us up and get more informed on issues as it affects us. Remember, no one knows it all; we are more experienced, more advanced and more exposed as we rob minds. Please be a part of our group and share your ideas with us. No idea is too small. It is everyone with his/her concept. Be that free person. Apologies to some requests still lying unattended to, we encourage further requests, concepts, questions and ideas. We share all joy with those who have moved on and those few friends we have mingled with. We also thank those who have in boxed and some of whom have called. Your first attempt is to inbox. It is not all MONEY! You need not belong to an evil society or encourage your mum to join witchcraft or a certain evil group before you can move on and make it in life. The lord will not come down to share ideas with you. Pray he does not make you a gap between you and that person who will open you up to the right track either by cash or by kind. I am not sure you have seen that situation where a person that cannot put up a simple proposal get a GRANT of N50,000,000.00, about $300,000.00 and that which is full of knowledge and ideas cannot access a loan of N500,000.00 about $3,000.00. That is how God does his work. Never think yourself or let anyone make you feel cheaper than you are worth! MAY THOSE WHO BLESS YOU BE BLESSED AND THOSE WHO CURSE YOU BE CURSED. N.B: You find our articles too long and are afraid to run out of your M.B.? open our page and try to log off the internet but leave this page open. Read the article or transfer your areas of interest to Microsoft word. Log on to the internet again and continue to browse. We have more and more business discussions and ideas on our page. Share your concepts with somebody today. The Lord will help you. We welcome again all our kids back to school for the summer season. REMEMBER: Never envy anybody. Never say it is not yet time to start. Never be confused in getting something started. Never be idle, get involved in a money making venture. Think of the end profits and benefits, not the initial pain. Be sure that the place you are now is but temporary. THE LORD HAS GOOD PLANS FOR YOU. GO OUT AND GRAB IT THIS WEEK. We talk on something more interesting next Monday. My best regards. I remain your friend, Olonade Abraham Olufemi. Bye now.
Posted on: Mon, 16 Sep 2013 13:28:23 +0000
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