MY CHRISTMAS LETTER, 2014 I can say without hesitation that 2014 has been a very hard year. Ive been through several breakups, one with a person I loved very much, Ive had to try and make it in a big city alone for the first time, seen my grandma diagnosed with cancer and my grandpa put on hospice, struggled to pass my classes, including failing Statistics last semester, suffered through a horrible few weeks of mono, and been barely keeping my head above water trying to pay the bills. But I also could not be more thankful for everything Ive gained this year. I hardly ever notice Gods presence in the moment or when I go seeking for Him in a church setting nowadays. Its almost always when I reflect in on what Ive gotten through and gained that I realize how undeniable His work is. Im still amazed at what Ive survived through even in these four years of college, especially with my ongoing battle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which I was clinically diagnosed with the summer of 2011. Ive grown into becoming my own woman, maintaining a loving relationship with my parents yet also coming into making my own life decisions and forming my own opinions. Ive learned that life is hard. Money isnt easy to manage, and not as abundant and easy to obtain as I thought it was when I was in high school. Love isnt a fairytale, and its not enough just to be a nice person. Loyalty is hard to find. School is harder than it once was. Sometimes its worth celebrating just to keep your head above water. But Im proud of what Ive become, and have few regrets. Ive written for two different publications for two years and learned under some of the best professors in the world, like Dr. Brad Owens and Professor Bob Darden. Ive gained such a better knowledge of the world through my journalism. Via journalism Ive come into a greater understanding of politics, learned about new cultures and religions, exposed hidden injustice, made friends from groups of people I never would have thought to associate with, and in the past year immersed myself in the military culture, which I have come to love and want to write about in the future. Ive strengthened long friendships, rekindled old ones, and of course made many cherished new friends. Ive grown into a strong woman who can love others fiercely but still stand up for what she knows she owes herself. And now, I will be graduating, Heaven willing, in August of 2015. I plan on making contact with newspapers Id like to work for over the break, and am hoping to have a job waiting when I graduate. I could say that all I want to do is be a journalist, except the inaccuracy there is that I want to also be a great friend and daughter. Perhaps some day a great pet owner, girlfriend, wife and maybe even mother. So when things get me down lately, I look back. I remember all the (pardon my French, my more conservative friends) shit Ive gone through, and I realize that there is no existential explanation for how I came through it all and reached the other side more whole, more encouraged. I can only thank God for my story, though not without also being proud of myself. He wouldnt want me to be anything less than that. It sounds silly, but whenever Im sad now, I listen to this fun Disney song and remember what August holds: youtu.be/4PtgRrRcKJM I end my Christmas letter with a statement of encouragement to those people in my life who are feeling at their wits ends. There is no beauty without often immense pain, and there is no YOU without the survival of trials. Dont apologize for who you are. There is no guardian angel to save you or magic pixie dust to make things in your life better, but God has equipped you to survive and be refined through the hardness of life. Your story is worth reading not because it is happy, but because it is hopeful. And because it is YOURS. Be thankful for the people who love you, because when others fail you, and when you fail yourself, theyll always be there. And no matter how much you mess up, look at how old you are, how different you are from how you used to be, and what lies ahead of you. You are strong. God has made you that way. Hes the one who pumps energy into your spirit and the blood through your veins, even though you dont realize it. You are a survivor. And you were created to be something great. Maybe you already are.
Posted on: Fri, 19 Dec 2014 21:33:15 +0000