Most times I busy myself with minute, trivial matters -- thus, further withdrawing, escaping from the most important life occurrences. Such as deaths in my family. Yet, I am not alone, in this family re: this matter - it isnt that I (or we) dont care or love. None of us want to face that we are becoming the elders of the family. OUR parents! I feel very strongly about this, we havent REALLY been a family united since we all sold the farms & since little Gram Draper died in 77. Am I wrong- who knows, IMO! I DO care & love, too deeply at times, thus the distancing...heartaches that my cousins have felt & are feeling-all of them! GOD knows why we face these aches but one thing I do know- we are connected by blood whether anyone admits or dares to say so- we all have our own ways of dealing. God Bless ALL My Family- what little is left of the main family- a sister (Aunt Bun) & sister in laws & of course the great expanse of their own offspring.. God Speed to each of you. As of the last Month we lost 2 wonderful women, both my aunts, Aunt Florence & yesterday Aunt Dottie. I can see them in my minds eye- vividly! probably one more reason or EXCUSE as to not see them at their later stage of life. I admit that. Guilty? Hell yes! Yet I recall the good times, the smiles & laughter emitting from (Aunts Florence & Dottie) them- happiness exuded from each of them like tiny bubbles....... In replacement of or in tandem with my own mourning of each & gratefulness of their lives- Ive taken up lost causes. (Raising my hand) Oh yes. Like the Tiger cat which no one wants, needs nor loves but a very few, myself & Covered Bridges. THANK YOU! I did something I used to see Aunt Dodie doing on the farm many a time today- broke up a hot dam cat fight. Today I learned Tigers name is actually MAX (IMAGINE THAT!?!?!?!), MAX?!! Come on, universe, can this be? Max/tiger & the black & white littler of the 2 were locked together, flat on the ground in a regular ole cat fight. Hell!! I hollered, Tiger Floppy STOP!! Course not their given names they looked at me & continued to kick each other til I physically stood over them- little black & white 1, I was worried about as I picked up tiger, as I recall Aunt Dodie & Grammie doing plenty of times. Looking at Tiger- MAX, I s/say, his eye was bleeding by the eyeball down to his nose & Charlie said he saw Floppy run like hell to the buildings neighbors- no blood trail.. Heartsick over a cat- 2 cats- PFFT! Had I neglected my own I surely w/be in the clink. (Shhhhh/it, lmao) I had called people of animal interests that I can think of, now begging CBs to do all in their power to save this cat from the elements, from the others & from himself... offering to assist in any way I can.. I realize there are expenses in all animals- our families are living proof of this-Especially back in the day. Right! I cannot blame the owner any longer-- I have to let that go, it wasnt very good medcine for me. Rather than pick up a pen & paper I pick up my fingers & continue to let them speak for me. I have picked up other things due to my frustration & anger & shame, but that is neither here nor there.. Praying for Paris & for Mother Earth.
Posted on: Fri, 09 Jan 2015 19:40:47 +0000
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