My biggest, worst failure was failing out of the University of Colorado. It was devastating. Although I was a delinquent growing up. I was always a science nut. One of my friends Joey that Ive been friends with since 1st grade remembers how I was a science nut even back in first grade. In 2nd grade I begged my mom to call both Centennial High and the University of Colorado to let me go to their schools because they both had great Astronomy and Chemistry programs. I saved my money for a year and a half to buy a Unitron 5000 telescope. When I was about 10, I remember that summer I went out at like 3 a.m. to see what was supposed to be Saturn. I dialed it in and I saw the face of god. I actually saw the rings of Saturn. I stepped back. I stood there in amazement for what seemed to be forever just trying to take in what I had just seen. This was what I loved. Although I score in the top 15% of any nationally ranked science quiz like the Praxis without studying, I also scored in the top 15% of the verbal section of the GRE. I even got an award from GRE. I never felt like I belonged at CU. I was told by so many that I didnt belong there. even my parents. At CU, one semester I had the highest grades in nearly all my classes. I was in the top 3. We all scored in the 90s. The next highest score was 54%. Yet at the end of the semester I got a B. This happened in all my classes that semester. I went from 4 As and a B to 4 Bs and a C. I quit. From that point on I quit trying. I failed out of CU. This was the most devastating event in my entire life. I went from loving Science, astronomy, biology, chemistry to caring about grades and what others thought of me. And I believed them. Years later I would be a stocker at Lowes. I stocked the shelves. I still have nightmares that I am never going to graduate from college. It just sticks with me. The years passed. I got married and had a little one. Funny thing. I started my software business and have been trying like hell to keep it alive for over a year now. No a single person from Pueblo or Springs has showed any interest in hiring me as a consultant. Everyone tells me, You have to go to... Boulder You have to go to... Boulder And Im scared to death of it. The place of my biggest failure and the turning point of my life. The place where I went from great (as far as actualizing who I could have been) to what I am now, a nobody. And Im scared to death. I start sweating just thinking about it. I am scared to death. There is a meeting tonight in Boulder, not big at all, a tech meetup. And Im currently writing the longest post ever... Because I dont know if I belong there and Ill feel like a fraud. Thats it... P.S. Dont ever emphasize grades to your kids. They dont mean anything. Even if they did get straight As. All that does is teach them how to get straight As. Emphasize their love of the subject and the wonderful work they produce. They will walk on water when you do that and they will become the person they were meant to be. P.P.S. Everybody had something they loved as a child. Well anyway. Much love!
Posted on: Mon, 17 Mar 2014 19:46:41 +0000
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