My continuing ongoing struggle receiving tacit antagonism continues. After going out to get groceries last night i was convulsing from sadness after the way i had been treated, and have been treated. I had a lot of negative emotion going through me like electricity going through my limbs, and a feeling of disorientation and confusion. I know it was caused by stealth antagonism by people in my environment. Im trying to deal with the pain of being hated, misunderstood and vilified,by many people-- I had had to take some pain killer to ease the pain, social rejection and antagonism causes pain in the body and mind as surely as physical abuse. i was feeling depressed beyond words. People who covertly abuse or engage in implicit psychological antagonism are everywhere in this superficial,competitive stratified society and I happen to be an easy target. I have brought it up and pointed it out many times over the years, which often results in the perpetrators either temporarily refraining from their hostility, especially when the teacher is looking, or becoming more artful and covert in implementing their ill will , which can have the effect of making me look like either a liar or an exaggerator, and discount or dismiss my experience, but I have never lied and it continues and will keep happening. It is painful to have to come to terms with a life plagued by so much animosity and disfavor.
Posted on: Tue, 05 Nov 2013 10:08:01 +0000
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