My day started out innocent enough. I arrived at work only to notice a large hornets nest perched above our entrance. It was then I decided it was time to go to war. I marched bravely towards battle armed with a water hose (no spray nozzle). I felt both anticipation and fear as I took aim and fired. One by one hornets fell to the ground fighting for their lives. The battle lasted only minutes but in the end I was victorious. I proudly held my head high as the day crept along. At the work days end I approached my motorcycle (its a scooter but motorcycle sounds more manlier) only to realize that I had won the battle but the war had just began. The hornets leader sat atop my motorcycle smoking a cigarette. He stared me down before finally saying in a deep ragged voice I know what you did......I know what you did and you will pay. Sweat rolled down my forehead dripping off the tip of my nose. I was paralyzed in fear. The hornet then flew away but not before puncturing my tires with his stinger. Now I fear for my life. I see him behind me in the mirror only to find him gone when I turn around. His shadow cascades across my shower curtain. I continuously get phone calls where all I hear is deep breathing. I thought about ending my life but I have a family that somewhat loves me....somewhat. Im asking no Im pleading for help. I need a hitman. I cant pay much.......$3.06 in change (mostly pennies) and an expired pack of Fruit Stripe gum (you know the gum with the zebra on it where the awesome flavor lasts like thirty seconds then disappears forcing you to chew another piece). Who will help me?
Posted on: Wed, 06 Aug 2014 19:09:13 +0000
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