My friend Matthew Bagonza, i have an Intelligence File from reliable sources on our brother from another mother Duncan Abigaba. Apparently the man is targeting to get Ugx 202 million in the next 20 months before the swearing in ceremony in May 2016. You see, he has abandoned the Urban Economics of organizing and managing Youth soccer leagues and has adopted the Marxist approach of Rural Engineering. He must be a student of Frantz Fanon like the Headmaster who went to Luweero SS and started with the mathematics of the triangle and then ended up in Kampala as the CEO of Ouganda Limited. The Intelligence File says our brother is now the MD of a very profitable and oily enterprise to do with those things in the book Animal Farm. The Kampala people call them P1G, the economists like Kwezi Tabaro call them PIGS (Portugal, Ireland, Greece and Spain). This man has made a plan on harvesting Ugx 202,000,000 in the next 20 months. How? HE is going to make Ugx 10,100,000 every month. He will make the Ugx 10.1m by selling 7 pigs per week thus 28 pigs in a month. Each pig will give 60 Kgs of pork and he will sell each kg of pork at Ugx 6,000. So (7pigs X 60kgs x 4 weeks x Sh6000) = Ugx 10,100,000. Now i know why this man has abandoned Urban Economics of Youth Soccer Leagues. Eeehh. And he is there very quiet, he hasnt tipped us off. For me i have leaked this Intelligence File like those Kayunga boys that were talking to the Head of Scouts and Guides, about the limousine UAJ 202M that got missing in Nairobi but was found in Kyankwanzi near Rwamasindi Poultry Farm. Furthermore, each of this mans pigs eats only 300kgs of maize bran (for 6 months) valued at Ugx 120,000 (Ugx 400 per kg), then he sells each pig at Ugx 360,000 (60kgs of pork x Ugx 6000). If you add other overhead costs like veterinary medicine, labour, transport etc, he spends only Ugx 150,000 on each pig and then sells it off at Ugx 360,000 thus a net profit of Ugx 210,000 per pig. If he sells his 28 pigs per month (since he wants to sell 7 per week), this man will harvest a net profit of Ugx 5,888,000 per month for the next 20 months!! Tell mewhether this man will still be in the Youth soccer league with all this money?!. He will just go to the rural areas as the sole capitalist and pseudo-Marxist. This man is cooking a revolution. The people in charge of NAADS should be very careful with him. He is going to to be the sole NAADS coordinator in the rural areas. Please send this file to the Chief of Station in Kasese, Eng Bright Anthony. I am told he is in charge of some road works there. We may soon need the services of Pleader Rwamuguma Mwene to counter the accusations that were made at the Maize Mill in Kabwohe. The man was threatening to cause inflation. He purchased and stocked 7 tonnes of maize bran. He wants to be like the people who dropped papers on Lumumba Avenue telling people to stock beer, condoms, g-nuts, sugarcanes and cabbages. Signed AR 00001983 Rwanyamahembe Avenue.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Sep 2014 11:27:15 +0000
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