My heart hurts.... We have a lot of adversity we are experiencing.... Im still having a rough go at processing my grief with Brenner passing at such a young age. I have a lot of emotions with Tanom. Having a son struggle with mental illness at such a young age. Worrying about Darius who at the age of 2 1/2 is learning to cope with his best friend and twin not being around to play with. Brooklyn and Brinlee as they adjust to new sisters and a step mom. Summer and Jordyn as they heal from their own adversity.... There is a lot more going on, and I know Im pretty open on Facebook but there are some things that we dont feel is appropriate to share... I dont know how to explain it any better than my heart hurts. Im not sure about anyone else, but I tend to take on the emotions of my kids... Their pain is my pain. Their hurts are my hurts... And thats just what they share with me. Who knows all that they keep to themselves for one reason or another. Taking their pains plus my pains has been burdening me quite a bit lately. I searched my journal for adversity and this story that I have shared a couple times came up. There is a story about a man who found a cocoon of a butterfly. He cut off the branch and took it home. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Growing impatient the man decided to help the butterfly, so he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly emerged easily, but it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly. He expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened! After many weeks the butterfly was unable to fly and eventually died. What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings, so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved it’s freedom from the cocoon. Struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If God allowed us to go through our life without any obstacles it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. And we could never fly. I dont know how Im going to get through this adversity, and it doesnt matter. I just close my eyes, and visualize myself on the other side of all of this with a smile, my burdens lifted away, and feeling complete Joy! I leave you with this prayer I have had in my heart constantly these past few days.... Lord, I dont like suffering. But I love you. If you will not take it away, please turn my suffering into good use. Have a good night and #thinkvertical
Posted on: Thu, 03 Jul 2014 03:49:19 +0000
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