My heart is broken and heavy heart. I cant depend on people in this world to fix it. Although they could. But I do serve a God that will come to right where I am no matter if Im right or wrong and heal the wounds be broken open all over again. Ive changed a lot I realize that but I am still the girl who loves people, love my church family, loves her friends, who loves her husband. The last 2 days satan used so many to attack me, my church, my family. It hurts so deeply so these hurts keep popping up like popcorn popped in the microwave. But if you leave the popcorn in to long it will be scorched and burned. I always try to use social media to uplift people sharing scripture and life lessons God throws me a line to. But lately every comment, video I post satan attacks with ugly mean and nasty comments. Its ruined me for 2 days now. Its ruined my Sunday I had planned with husband, then I caught myself angry at him over stupid stuff, but I was hurt and it was important to me! Then night same senecio different video it comes back again. Once again social media is stealing another evening with my husband I had high hopes for!! But here I am being real no this post is not normal feel you good post Im just being real and most of you out there has been where I am walking now. So dont get all holier thou and act like you never get hurt or rejected over and over. Why do I feel the need to please people who doesnt know I exist, or even the people that I do exist to? Im doing a lot of praying right now and if I dont see some changes in situations then I may have to make a few decisions on my own. All I ever have asked from anyone is to love unconditionally, forgive me when I wrong, help to feel that Im righteous enough and ministry is enough. Is it ok to walk away after you tried and tried, promises been made promise have been broken, but it doesnt change I love you! Im really needing a spiritual and emotional healing at this very second! You say you past haunts you but it seems its my Present that haunts me the most,! Doesnt matter if you think Im unworthy, unrighteousness, a nobody, or sometimes body when its at your convience, my God wants me just the way I am and never have to feel ugly, unworthy, or a nobody! Because just like God is everything to me I am everything to Him! So here my friends is my broken hallelujah! youtu.be/Fo3DudOzV4k
Posted on: Tue, 28 Oct 2014 05:23:53 +0000
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