My mother is a Christian woman, and when I was a child, she was my strongest supporter when it came to following my dreams. She did what any great parent would when motivating thier child to give thier all in every endeavor and under all circumstances. But now that I think back, being a good Christian and being a good parent had to seriously conflict. For example, when I was 11, I sang We Are The World in Vacation Bible School. Well not the whole song ....just Bruce Springsteens, Kenny Loggins and Huey Lewis parts. None of which I came remotely close to sounding like. It was more like Bruce Banner (the incredible hulk), Kenny from South Park and a Huey Helicopter flying over the jungle in Vietnam. But after the performance, Momma said I sounded great, and she was proud of me. This statement was only half true. Hmmmmmmmm.... guess which half was a lie. If youve ever heard me sing, this requires no thought. Or what about in the 9th grade when I wanted to play the trumpet in the marching band. People...I have asthma!! And everyone knows that people with asthma dont play wind instruments....atleast everybody knew that but me and my Momma. And Heaven forbid they ever asked me to play and march at the same time. I wouldve needed an inhaler the size of a scuba tank, and the paramedics wouldve needed to march right beside me pushing a gurney. Thank God it never came to that. But my good Christian Momma sounded so positive when she said you can do anything you put your mind to, I decided try the trumpet anyway. Needless to say, I never became the next Dizzy Gillespie. What I became was dizzy, passed out, and awakened with the band instructor and school nurse standing over me shaking thier heads. And what about when I looked like a football runningback....but wanted to be a basketball point guard? In tryouts looking like Cedric the Entertainer trying to run the offense...5 foot 9 and 259 pounds of COMEDY!! Or when I wanted to be a Army sniper. Momma said you come from a long line of military men. But did they have 20/400 vision? I didnt need a rifle scope or a spotter. Just mount my glasses to the barrel and I wouldve bulls-eyed every target my commander didnt want me to hit. Death by friendly fire wouldve went up by 200% if I followed my Mommas encouragement to enlist. They probably wouldve told me to fight on the side of the enemy, and Korea would be unified right now. But I said all that to say this...God, please forgive my Momma. She was and always will be a good Christian and a great parent. And please understand that even though you called her to be a minister early in life, she waited until I was grown before she answered the call. As you can see, being the greatest mother ever wouldve been a conflict of interest.
Posted on: Mon, 04 Nov 2013 20:11:44 +0000
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