Myth: Telling your child they are smart will make them smarter and more confident. False!!!! Kinder Koaches will never discourage kind words to your child, but studies have shown that frequently telling your child how “smart” they are can actually be counterproductive! In an American study using a group of 4th graders, researchers found that kids who were praised for their intelligence tended to avoid challenges due to the fear of failure, exuded less effort in tasks and focused primarily on how they measured up to others. On the other hand, kids that were praised for their efforts (“I am so proud of how hard you worked on that project”) showed the opposite effect. These kids tended to enjoy more challenging tasks, were less afraid of failure, exuded more effort in tasks and were more interested in learning new things! When praising your kids, try to use words that focus on what they did to have the successful result. Here are some examples of how you can praise a child’s efforts: You worked so hard on that and it turned out wonderful! You put so much thought into that project and it really paid off! You really thought creatively, this is a beautiful picture! You really studied hard, and you got an A! Great work! You worked so well as a team to build that amazing block tower! It is wonderful if you have a naturally gifted child, but keep in mind that 50% is nature and the other 50% is nurture. So let’s nurture our children to be the happiest people they can possibly be!
Posted on: Sun, 11 Aug 2013 23:05:46 +0000