Ndate Munyinda N C Nambula writes; Divorce seems a much easier decision to reach by women than men. This is the back drop of ndate Munyindas statement; *Ndola high court has recorded an increase in divorce cases filed in from 30 cases in 1999 to 62 cases in the year 2012. These numbers would be more if it wasnt for the remarkable effort that the National legal Aid Clinic for women has put into preserving the culture of healthy family through marriage. How ever this is only october 2013 and the numbers are already standing at 45 meaning this year is likely to be either the same or even more than last year. the margin will be slight though. Every single day atleast one couple frequents the High Court with the intention to divorce. The trend though has been that women express this intent more often than men. Most of these women cant foot the legal fees involved and thus are referred to the National Legal Aid Clinic for Women whom owing to the numbers of cases that are eventually filed in the High Court seem to be doing a commendable Job at reconciling marriages. Of every 5 people every week that approach the court with intent to want to divorce only 1 will be a man. However most of the women have been advised not to file first and thus are left with no option but to frustrate their partners often times to file for divorce first. This to me has evened the number of cases filed in by women in comparison to men. Had Ndola High Court only been interested in collecting revenue or had the registries been filled men only, most of the cases filed in by men would have been filed in by their wives instead.* Why then has Divorce become so fashionable for women? The Educated especially Ndate Munyinda took time to talk to one Librarian Beautiful lady from Northrise University why divorce seems to be the order of the day and this was her response; look man. I am empowered, educated, aware and independent. For how long do you think i will condone you if you where my husband to treat me bad? This is the most common statement among the women that come to the High Court expressing intent to divorce their husbands. Has women empowerment though become an excuse for women not work on their marriages. Was shipikisha theory really totally irrelevant. Come to think about it, how many of us would have grown up in families had this theory not been perpecuated. women seem to want to divorce as an act of last resort, a will to purnish their husband for the wrongs they have been victim to and to prove a point that they are modern. A women trying to fight to make her marriage now in our days is considered old fashioned. When a man though, as discorvered from talking to most of them that file in Ndola High Court for divorce it comes as a resolve to make that sacrifice. Facts being facts, from these ends it looks like men stand to lose a lot from divorce than women and thats why maybe the western world introduced the concept of prenuptual agreements. Okay so lets ask this question? If Prenuptual agreement where signed before marriages in Zambia, how many would end up in divorce? Ofcourse not over looking the fact that there are a few ligitmate cases for divorce. Society is not helping matters too. It sympathises more with a divorced woman than a divorced man. A divorce women is a victim in the eyes of society while a divorced man is seen as being unstable and having no direction in life. Men have the more reason to stay in marriage to preserve their dignity making it a more difficult decision to make. For women however it sometimes may be the best decision and blessing in dsiguise. She is looked at as having control of her life. She is given more respect for standing her ground. In some cases because she is the victim she is even highly employable. For men though, divorce and you will be looked at as a weak man with no single control of family matters which society must not be blamed for thinking because it is true. Ndate Munyinda further adds what a man is thinking when he cheats on his woman and probably when he opts for divorce?
Posted on: Thu, 17 Oct 2013 08:13:38 +0000
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